Where Living and Life Meet

All Posts now at www.denisehildreth.com

2009-05-20T11:15:00.002-05:00

All my posts are now being posted on my website. A new post is up today and new posts will be posted periodically. Check it out! www.denisehildreth.com

Haven't Gone Away

2009-04-25T09:48:00.003-05:00

Hey my sweet friends,

Thank you for your kind notes. I promise I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. We are in the process of redoing my website to turn it into a blog, and all of my attention has been focused on that. It will make it interactive just like this blog, and allow me to not have to maintain so many different sites. So, hopefully it will be up by next week and I will send out an e-mail as soon as we get it ready. So, if you aren't on my e-mail list, go to www.denisehildreth.com, shoot me a quick e-mail and click on "get updates from Denise". That will have you on my e-mail list. So, hang in there with me. Promise we will still have updates, blog postings and inspirational thoughts. Thank you for how gracious you've been to hang with me. Sure have enjoyed this journey!
Now, onto a new one!

Denise

The Pictures We Paint

2009-04-06T14:47:00.009-05:00

Forgive my week off. I took a much needed getaway which will be a little piece in our story. So, thank you for letting me go a week without posting anything. Right before I left, my friend and counselor, Ken Edwards came to speak to our Bible Study. He talked that day about the pictures that we all have of what our life would be like. You know, who you're going to marry, what you're going to be. We've had these pictures since we were little.

My first picture included being married to Donny Osmond, (that didn't work out to well, although he has officially touched my right hand.) And it also included be a school teacher. (Okay teacher yes, school, not so much.) But through life we continue to try to fit life into our picture. If something is outside of our box, but we think it should be inside our box we'll do our best to cram it inside, relationships, careers, friendships...you name it. We'll stuff and cram and stuff and cram until we look like Monica in the early years of Friends.

But what if instead we opened up that box? What would happen? Dare I say, would God have room to actually get inside, begin to orchestrate our lives the way He sees fit. Begin to Author our story the way only He can do when given the freedom to be the amazing Artist that He is. I have to say I thought I had released my picture. I've released more in these past two years than I even thought I had to release! But I found myself, that even though I had let go of so much of my picture, I was creating a new picture. And once again, I was deciding what I thought should and shouldn't belong. And with Ken's words came the challenge to once again, undo the frame and give God the freedom, the ability to design my life the way He chooses too. I don't know what my future looks like. I never thought I'd be where I am today, so I'm sure past guessing where I'll be tomorrow. But my prayer is that everytime I begin to place the frame around my "What should be's." God will graciously remind me that my picture is so limiting. And if I desire anything, it is to place no limitations on a limitless God. Our pictures are nice, I'm sure. But God has amazing waiting!

(Me and Donny's nephew, Justin.)

A Little Bit of Change

2009-03-24T09:37:00.006-05:00

I was transplanting some rose bushes this morning. Don't know if they'll be too happy about it, but time will tell. Change is never fun. In fact, there are times it can be downright frustrating. Like when you move and that first week in your new home you wake up in the middle of the night and head to the closet thinking it's the bathroom. Or when you change jobs, schools, neighborhoods, churches and you have to be relearned. Tell your story all over again and try to discern who can be a real friend.

But change can be liberating too. Just ask my two and a half year old Shih-tzu, Sophie. She just got a haircut. I mean a hair cut! Top knot gone and everything! I thought she might be traumatized. But when she came prancing herself back through my front door that day, she had a swagger in her walk like I haven't seen. When her tail wag, her entire but shook. And when she saw that carpet she rolled her body around log a pig in slop! She has not for one moment regretted her new do.

And being relearned isn't always a bad thing either. That means we have the opportunities to learn about others as well. Hear new stories. Make new friends. See what else is out there in that world that we've missed.

I know this is a season of change for so many. Just like spring has finally folded back the last curtain of winter, some of you are turning pages of your own life. But I encourage you today to have no fear! But a swagger in your walk. Roll around on the carpet if you want. And have a Coca-Cola with a new friend and hear their story. You just might find that change can be an opened door to an entire new world. And if you need encouragement just ask Sophie, she'll tell you. Anyone who has worn a pony tail for two and a half years and is finally set free will tell you that change is a good thing. A very good thing:)

Too read more of Denise's blogs log on to www.denisehildreth.blogspot.com

Closed Doors

2009-03-17T13:22:00.003-05:00

I remember years ago when my dreams of being Miss America came crashing down. (All laughter must now cease...) A friend came over to the house one day as I was sitting in front of the television eating my weight in chocolate cake watching the pageant over and over on my VCR tape. (Yes, that's how old I am.) I kept saying, "I've watched this thing a hundred times and I still haven't won! My friend says, "Sometimes God closes and door and sometimes he bolts it shut."

Years later I still have to remind myself that God's closed doors are as much God's blessing as are His opened doors. Not that closed doors are near as much fun as open doors. We love open doors. We get to explore new things. We get to grow in new ways. We get to meet new people. Kind of like what I think going on the Amazing Race would be like! But I've already bored you with that adventure.

But can my heart acknowledge God, appreciate God, have faith in God, even when He closes the door. Had to face that today. Last Wednesday at our Bible Study I had asked all of our ladies to fast together today. And of course, what do I get, but a letter in the inbox of my e-mail that is another closed door. Once again, I had to stop, grab my breath and go to the one who closed the doors.

The question was simple. "Do you trust me even when I close doors?" I felt like Peter with my answer, "Lord, where else would I go."

I have nothing profound this week. (No laughing again...) Just a simple question to each of us. Will we trust God even with the closed doors. Because they are as much His love and mercy as those that He opens. I don't know about you, but I'm not real good with options anyway. So, as long as He opens the one that is His perfect one, then that is perfectly fine with me...

Telling Your Story

2009-03-10T15:48:00.005-05:00

I teach a weekly Bible Study and we are studying the book of Esther. Esther seems to be the topic of the times. When I began writing the curriculum for our study over Thanksgiving, I had no idea that Beth Moore was going to have a new study come out of Esther as well. A couple weeks after Christmas, I got a letter from my friend Robert Sterns in Israel, who said he was working on a new book about Esther. Like I said, looks like we have something to learn from Esther.

As we go into our lesson tomorrow Esther is going to approach the king. It is her moment. I can kind of hear the over done beauty pageant version of "This is the Moment" playing on the palace muzak in the background. But something has been stirring in my heart since the Lord placed this study on my heart six months ago. That it is no accident that you and I are alive during this time. We were the ones, chosen before the foundations of the world, to live during this time. With all of its chaos, all of its technology, all of its self-absorption, and all of its desperate need.

And each one of us has a story. Twice before Mordecai has told Esther she can't tell her story. But at the end of Chapter four he makes it clear that this might be the very reason she has come to the kingdom, been chosen as queen. Basically, girl this is your moment and you better show up or your booty is toast. Don't think those palace walls are going to protect you when you're looking destiny in the face and refuse to follow through.

I love a good story. Just got finished reading three good books recently, only one of which has come out yet. It is my book pick for this month, A Hundred Years of Happiness. I love the power of a story. I also love to hear people's stories. Each week in our Bible Study we have a personal testimony. Been a while since you've heard one of those at church? But each week someone comes up after the study and tells how that person's testimony ministered to their hearts. Why? Because we've all got a story.

I started a single's blog called Flying Solo because of the process and story of my divorce. Each week I tell part of my story. We get letters all the time of people's whose lives have been touched because of the stories and personal testimonies that they read each month.

You have a story too you know. A story that someone needs to hear. It doesn't mean you have to get up behind the pulpit Sunday morning and bare your soul, but someone might could stand to hear it over a cup of coffee, at a Thursday night dinner, or over the phone when they've had a really bad day. Your place of encouragement, your moment of crisis, your victory, your challenges, your story...someone needs to hear it.

Someone else could have done Esther's job. Mordecai made that really clear. "Esther, you don't show up, trust me, someone else will be there to do the job." But God wanted to use Esther. He wants to use you and me too. We don't need a theological degree. We just need time and a willing heart...because everyone has a story. Whether you've written a book or not, God has written one with your life. And someone needs, no, is desperate to read it.

Do Miracles Still Happen?

2009-03-01T07:58:00.006-06:00

I was studying yesterday, working on my Bible Study lesson for Wednesday, when I came across an article. The writer said, "We know miracles no longer happen." Made me stop. I thought, well you never met my friend Roy who was completely healed of cancer. Or my girlfriend who was healed of the HPV virus. Or my dad who was completely healed of Sugar Diabetes. Or my older brother who was healed of epilepsy. Didn't find it strange that he had never seen miracles, because he didn't believe they were possible.

Kind of reminded me of Proverbs 18:21 that says, "Death and life [are] in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof." I was teaching on this passage of scripture a couple weeks ago. Remembering that what I speak holds in itself the power of life and death. And the fruit of it will be what comes to fruition in my own life. A year ago I was doing Beth Moore's study on Daniel. She was talking about the difficult situations of life, the moments when we need a miracle. And she said, "Sometimes we can be delivered from the fire. Sometimes we can be delivered through the fire. Sometimes we can be delivered by the fire." But that she always prayed with all of her heart to be delivered from the fire. My kind of girl!

There are many people who never find healing. Cancer takes them. Heart Attacks snuff out their lives. And death happens. It is a part of this cycle of life. And I'm not here to debate the "why some do and why some don't." I'm just here to remind us that miracles still happen.

But greater than the healing of our bodies to me is the healing of our soul. I believe miracles still happen, because I don't believe there is any greater miracle than a heart that believes they can be made whole. When someone comes to believe that Jesus Christ can redeem them, there is no greater miracle.

I prayed for years for my home to be restored. For my marriage to be all that I knew it could be. But I never saw that miracle happen. But I still believe marriages can be healed. I still speak to couples on the ability God has to heal and to restore. Romans 8 tells us that "the same power that raised Christ from the dead dwells inside of me." Could I have quit believing there was hope for broken marriages when mine didn't make it? Absolutely. Could you believe that cancer can't be healed when your mother or father, or spouse or friend died from it? Of course you could. But does it lesson God's healing power? Absolutely not.

We will go to our grave never understanding much of life. But our ability to understand, in no way limits God's ability to move. He is still Healer, Deliverer, Savior, Father and Friend. The healing of our physical man requires both our faith and a trust in God's perfect will. But trust me, if I needed physical healing, I'd have one prayer, "Deliver me From!"

But God is just as present to heal the broken places of our marriages, the broken places of our past, whether it was abuse, trauma, neglect, control, and He is present to heal the broken places of our soul today. Miracles still happen. I see them everyday, in marriages that didn't look like they would make it, but two hearts that were willing to do anything to try. I see miracles ever day in lives who still believe change is possible. And I see miracles every day when someone realizes that there is no place so broken, so undone, so desperate, that Jesus won't reach down and heal, restore, mend and redeem. It doesn't matter the lies propagated by the "Accuser of the Brethren." What matters is who you and I are willing to believe. A life is only as redeemable as the truth it is willing to claim. And only as broken as the lie it is willing to believe.

I never tire of seeing a miracle. And I'm always praying for one somewhere and for someone. And I'm always grateful when a heart believes a miracle is available for them.

If reading this on Facebook go to www.denisehildreth.blogspot.com to read more posts by Denise.

Being Known

2009-02-24T07:40:00.006-06:00

After my divorce I remember sitting across from my precious counselor and telling him, "I don't want to be relearned. I'm known." Someone knew my past, my hopes for the future, someone knew me. But this past week, I've had a revelation regarding being known. Part of it began last Thursday night. I'm sitting in J. Alexanders with my best friend from middle school, who I had not seen since I moved away the beginning of my freshman year. So, we're talking quite a while. We reconnected a couple weeks ago on Facebook, of all places, and realized that we had lived forty-five minutes away from each other for the last seven years and not even known.

As we sat across from each other reconnecting and catching up on the last twenty some years we began to recount our middle school days. We laughed over her crush of Raymond Whipple, who was the "Danny Zuko" of middle school. We laughed over my beating Alan Coker for Student Council President even after he had made campaign pencils to pass out and everything. She had been my campaign manager, and we had stunk, until I gave my debate speech, read a cheesy poem I had gotten from the back of a beauty pageant program book and got the crowd on their feet. During the middle of the conversation the thought crossed my mind, "She knows you."

Friday evening I had a dinner party for one of my mentors and his wife, my pastor and his wife, and my Nashville mom and her husband. As we sat around the table and talked and laughed, I realized that these people know me at this season of my life.
Sunday afternoon a group of friends came in from Atlanta. Some I've known for years, others only a few months, but each one knows some part or piece of my life. The thing I had been afraid I had lost through the loss of my marriage, the Lord has shown me these last few days how I am known.

But it goes farther than that. There was also a moment this weekend that He once again showed me how well He knows me. And that moment this weekend, sitting on my sofa, my niece Georgia laying on the sofa beside me, the book I had just finished in my hands and the tears running down my cheeks, my Father said, "I know you so well."

Ever felt forgotten? Ever felt like someone didn't know your past, doesn't care about your future, isn't interested in your today? Ever wondered if anyone out there would even miss it if you were gone. Oh, my friend, you are so known.

You're past is known- "Before you were formed in your mother's womb I knew you."
You're future is known- "I know the plans that I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope."
And you are known today- this very moment- "The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore."

Your being known goes even beyond the womb. Before your parents even thought of you God had designed you, destined your days, and placed before you the choice for how you and I would choose to walk those days out.

He also has plans for your future. they are plans that desire to prosper you and not to harm you. He has a future for you and a hope. We know today that earth's hope is in short supply. But heaven's hope never runs out.

He is also watching over what we do today. Our comings and our going. My friends, we are known. Every part of us is known. And we can't go to the depths of hell or despair, we can't walk through a grief too great, or a sin so overwhelming that He isn't there. We also can't experience a joy so enrapturing or a victory so great that He isn't in that too.

I don't know where you may be today. Encapsulated in grief or enraptured with joy, He is there. He's not pushy. He's not obtrusive. But He loves to be invited into your pain or into your joy. The decision is ours.

It isn't that bad to have people learn you I've discovered. It's like watching a movie for the second time with someone whose never gone before and you are able to enjoy it through their new experience of it. But it's also really nice to be known. Trust me, you've never been known this way before.

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A Second Look

2009-02-17T06:18:00.004-06:00

Sunday afternoon I wanted to light a candle in my kitchen. I pulled open the drawer to find the lighter and couldn't find it anywhere. I had a slightly panicked moment thinking, "How am I going to light any of my candles if I can't find my lighter." That was when I noticed them sitting in the bottom of the drawer. The matches. You know, the things we use to use before lighters were made. That restaurants use to advertise on all the time. Yep, had them. Right there in the drawer, so I wasn't going to spend the rest of my life candleless. But for a fleeting moment, I honestly was thinking there was no way to light my candle except a lighter.

This isn't real different from what happens in so many moments of life. I call it the "first look." The "first look" to most situations is the view through our flesh. It's the panicked moment over the economy. It's the anger over the injustice. It's the hurt over the offense. But the beauty of relationship with Jesus provides a "second look." It provides peace when everyone else seems to be quaking in their loafers. It provides forgiveness when it's not deserved, and sometimes not even asked for. It provides us the ability to see past our offense and into the heart of our offender. Realizing that most people hurt others out of their own places of pain.

I love the picture on the cover of Savannah by the Sea. And no, that's not me. But it represents the place to me of peace. The place you and I are called to rest. The place the "second look" affords. We're told, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid" Jesus is the Prince of Peace. And He has left us with Himself. The only way you and I can lose our peace is to give it away. It cannot be taken from us. Jesus can't be taken. But we can hand over our peace.

This is a season of life where the enemy of our soul is feasting on people's "first looks." He wants to hold us there, staring at the candle with no seemingly lighter. Focused on the television with a remote control that doesn't work. But both of these are still viable. How? They have other resources of power. And so do we. We have the ultimate resource of power. Our circumstances do not define our God. Our faith will determine how He works in our life.

So, we can live in the clutches of our "first look", popping Tums, biting our nails, living with ulcers. Or we can take Savannah's attitude up there and rest in the love of our faithful Father. That even if the world feels out of control, He has never lost it.

My Valentine

2009-02-10T07:47:00.006-06:00

This month on my singles blog, "Flying Solo", www.denisehildreth.typepad.com, we're talking about the much dreaded "single's" holiday Valentine's Day. But I bet if we were being honest, it's a dreaded holiday for a lot of people who are married as well. I have a lot of friend's who would rather spend an hour in the dentist's chair than be forced to endure another Valentine's that doesn't meet what their heart desires. The card not given, the love not displayed, the flowers wilted, the chocolate melted, the thoughtfulness non-existent, the disappointment huge.

What I've discovered however is that Valentine's is what we make of it. Last year me and two of my best friends, went to my favorite restaurant and talked and laughed for three hours. Then two of other friends happened to be there as well and sat down at our table and we talked and laughed some more. We brought each other chocolate and flowers and company. And it was one of the most wonderful Valentine's I've ever had.

This year will be much the same. A good friend, a good movie, a big Coca-Cola, but I've added something different this year. I'm mailing cards to some special people in my life. I quit mailing Christmas Cards a while back, but this year, I wanted to celebrate this day, celebrating the people who I love.

You know, I've learned through pain and heartache that no person will ever meet all of our needs. That's why their human. Yet so many people live their entire lives placing all of their expectations on living a satisfied life on how another person performs in theirs. And they spend their lives perpetually disappointed. No person will ever meet all of your needs. Your spouse can hurt you, Your children will leave you, (at least one can hope), Your friends can disappoint you, but only one will never fail.

Jesus is so cool, he knew we would have this as an issue, so he put someone with an "extreme" case right in the Bible so we could have an example. He decides to make a pit stop one day in Samaria. It's not on the agenda. Didn't google "Neat places to hang out in the area." No, He's God and He knew, this was a place He needed to go. So, He gets to Samaria, hangs out by the water cooler, or well, and waits. And that's when she shows up.

Now, she didn't come with the other women. Why? Because she's an outcast. Long since kicked out of the "girls" club. Her friends walked away. Betrayed her. Left her. Abandoned her. You pick the adjective. So, she comes by herself, in the brutal heat of the day. But this day is different. This day someone is waiting. He tells her if she knew who He was that she would ask Him for water. Because His water would allow her to never thirst again. She becomes slightly indignant, basically asking Him who He thinks He is.

Then he throws the bomb. Why don't you go get your husband? Now, don't think for a moment He asked a question because He didn't know the answer. Remember, Jesus always knows the answer. He asked the question, because just like us, we have to come to our own revelations of our own hearts before change can ever occur. People can tell us things a thousand times, but until we have our own personal revelation, change won't happen.

I can imagine her lowering her jug to her hip, dropping her head, kicking the sand with her sandal. "I don't have a husband."

"Bingo!" Well, Jesus didn't say Bingo, but he was probably thinking it. "You spoke right. In fact, you've had five! And the man you're with now isn't one of them."

Drink of me and you'll never thirst again....

So many of us have drunk at the well of relationships for so long that we don't know what we look like without one. We don't know how to be alone. How to let God love us in our deep places. We are defined by our relationships. Without be wife, husband, mother, father, boy-friend, girl-friend, we think we have no identity. Somehow, "child of God," "beloved", "daughter", "son", "precious ones", doesn't seem to be enough. Yet, we like the woman at the well, stay perpetually thirsty. We stay continually disappointed. Never quite fulfilled. Why? Because that water will always leave us thirsty. No person will ever satisfy what only God can fill. Go ahead and try if you want. And then you can try again. But trust me on this one, no person will ever satisfy what only God can fill. That's why David said, "Lord, my expectation is from you." It's not on my spouse. It's not on my children. It's not on my parents. It is on you.

You know what is so amazing about the story of the woman at the well? When she ran from the well that day to go tell the city that loathed her, rebuffed her, disregarded her, about the Jesus that had changed her life, she left her water jug. Yep, the very thing she thought she had gone there to fill up seemed useless in the light of what God had given her. I'm not going to say there will come a day when the people that we love will be irrelevant. What I am going to say is that when Jesus becomes the center of our Joy, then all of the other relationships in our life come to a place of proper perspective. And our expectation is not from them, but from God. And when He is the center, everything else works better.

Want the perfect Valentines? Place the expectations of your heart and life on your heavenly Father. He never disappoints. Then, spend the day celebrating the people you love, knowing that if they never loved you the way you desire, or maybe even the way you deserve, you are always loved to the depth of your soul by the one who matters most. Happy Valentines my friends.

25 Random Things

2009-02-03T08:16:00.013-06:00

Okay- so Facebook has sucked me in to its lively discourse. A friend told me when I got on there, "Welcome to the vortex that is Facebook." I told her "this will not consume me!" Then I found old friends I haven't talked to in years. I found people I had gone to school with from all over and couldn't believe I had lived this long without getting on Facebook. Then, I realized how you can stay connected with people and let them know what you're doing. Then came the 25 Random Things About Me, notes that I kept getting. I was like, "I'm never doing that." Well, here I am. Doing that. I think I'm going to stop saying, "I'm never doing that." Unless of course we're talking about jumping out of planes or eating bugs. I can assure you, I'm never doing that. So, here is my contribution to the Facebook vortex. And if you're on there you're more than welcome to become my friend. Can't promise I'll always be able to respond, but I can promise that it is one of the coolest things I've ever done. Do people still say cool? Anyway, when you get through reading these, go write your own. You will find it harder than you think. I promise. The Facebook Experience 25 Random things about me. 1- I’ve never broken a bone. 2- I was born in Hagerstown, MD- It is below the Mason Dixon Line so I am southern 3- I’ve attended 10 different schools 4- I’ve lived in 13 different houses 5- I once sang both an Italian aria and a German aria for my final grade in Vocal Performance my Freshman Year at The College of Charleston. 6- I’ve visited 10 different countries. My favorite was Austria. 7- I traveled to England when I was 13 in a touring Theater Group for 3 weeks without my mother. (What was she thinking!) 8- The first man I planned on marrying was Donny Osmond. Unfortunately, he never planned on it... 9- I’m yet to decorate my own house. Going to decorate my next one! 10- I was once written up in the “criminal” section of my College Newspaper. 11- I worked for 3 years as a Senate Page for the South Carolina Senate. 12- I worked as a DJ in college for 3 years at the radio station in my hometown. 13- I once sang to “John Black” from Days of Our Lives who just got the boot! 14- I performed for two years at the Piccolo Spoleto Festival in two different plays in Charleston, South Carolina 15- I never use my first two initials together- Why you ask? Because my name is Valerie Denise… 16- I use to love to swing lizards by their tales until they fell off. I learned this from my older brother. 17- I once wanted Katie Couric’s job. Until I realized what time she had to get up. 18- If I could do any job other than what I do, I’d be a labor and delivery nurse. I was in the room for the birth of two of my nieces and it is the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen. 19- I was in the room when someone passed away. That too is one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. 20- I took my driver’s test on a stick shift and have loved driving them ever since. 21- My dream is to one day to have my own piece of the world with horses and dogs and no houses within 500 acres. 22- I make the best homemade biscuits and fried chicken you’d ever want to eat. Well, after my mama. 23- I can’t stand to hear people file their nails. 24- If I were rich, the one indulgence I would give myself is having fresh flowers all the time. 25- I use to be addicted to sweat tea instead of Coca-Cola. (You just fell out of your chair didn’t you!)

Facing Fears

2009-01-26T20:13:00.002-06:00

Since this is all about enjoying life, few things make me happier or feel more alive than going to the circus. I'm not sure when it started, but when I was little my parents would take us to the Ringling Brothers anytime it would come to town.

So, every year that it comes to Nashville I head to get tickets. As I was sitting there last night with three of my closest friends my heart always skips a beat whenever the trapeze artists come out. I'm deathly afraid of heights. I've always said that if I was going to bungee jump or jump out of an airplane I'd have to be knocked out and pushed over. That is the only way you'd get me down. (Thus the reason I probably wouldn't be so great on the Amazing Race...)

So last night when Mr. Trapeze Man took off, I leaned over and asked my friend Karol, "How do you think they get past the fear?" She said, "Because they've already fallen and they know what it feels like." I said, "That's good." I realized there was so much truth in that statement. That so much of fear is what is perceived. It has nothing to do with truth. But everything to do with what we perceive might be.

Kind of like my mother Saturday night. I had gone out to dinner with friends and got in the car and saw that she had called me four times. She never calls me that much. But we had been talking earlier that day and I had to get off the phone because I was lost and had to figure out where I was going. She didn't hear from me again so had come to the conclusion that I was really lost! A perceived fear.

Gets me to wondering how many things in life I have missed because of a perceived fear. Wonder if I really would enjoy bungee jumping? I'm thinking not, but just for the sake of argument. I don't want to live my life afraid. I want to live my life in that perfect place of love that casts out all fear. Granted we need wisdom, but not fear. A healthy respect, but not fear. My friend Tommy said last night as we left the circus that it was that respect that kept them safe. Not fear.

My, what we can learn from the circus. May this new year be a year where our fears no longer hold us captive. May this be a new year where being alive and enjoying the moment is not apologized for. And may this be a year when we'd no longer live our lives by things we perceive, but only by things we know to be true. And when we're through let's grab some friends along for the ride. Granted I doubt we'll be as cute as this group, and hopefully not as large, but I've learned that living is a lot more enjoyable when you're doing it with others...

More than you wanted to know...

2009-01-19T19:18:00.004-06:00

Recent Interview with Nora St. Laurent of Finding Hope Through Fiction:

Out of all the hats that you have worn over the years, public speaker, author, singer, song writer etc; what hat has been the most rewarding for you and the most fulfilling?

I’ve been teaching now for ten years. That by far is the most fulfilling to me. This past year I began a new Bible Study in my community and there is just something special about being able to talk one on one with ladies, break the word of God and watch it come alive in their hearts. There is honestly nothing more powerful to me than that.

Some writers plot out what they are going to write step by step and other say they write by the seat-of-their-pants, which style of writing best describes your style?

Distraction of Purity
Oh my, I’m a “write as I go” kind of girl. I like to see where the story takes me. I always know where I’ll start and where I’ll finish, but I like to give the characters the opportunity to let their story play out. And it’s like I just get to stand on the sidelines and watch it play out. I’ve had characters die, that when I sat down to write that morning had no idea that they would end up dead! Now, what is more exciting than that? Not the dead thing…just the ability to let the story lead you…

What inspires you to write? What inspires you when you write?
You know, I’m not sure that one thing inspires me to write. It’s really multiple things. The story itself inspires me. When you’re a writer, there is a story inside of you that you can’t keep there. You have to get it out. You have to get it on the page. I have people come up to me all the time that say, “I’m going to write a book one day.” But a writer doesn’t wait for “one day.” A writer has to write. You just can’t help it.

The other thing that motivates me is knowing that I have the opportunity to tell a story that can touch and possibly change someone in some way. Maybe it offers them some hope, stirs up their passion, calms a fear, or speaks to a place of pain and brings healing. That is so important to me. I’ve never wanted to write a book that is simply, “a good read.” It is always about telling a story that will touch the very heart of the reader.

Is being an author everything you thought it would be? If not, what has been surprising to you? Please explain.

You know, I never planned on being a writer. It just kind of was revealed to me through doors of opportunity. So, I didn’t grow up thinking, “One day I’m going to be John Grisham.” Most surprising…Not everyone makes John Grisham’s money!

I know from your newsletter that you spent the summer in Atlanta. What site seeing did you enjoy most? What stood out to you on this trip that you didn't know about Atlanta before?
I’ve always loved Atlanta. I’ve traveled through there for the last seventeen years going from my home in Nashville, back to my hometown in South Carolina. Some of my closest friends live there, so it’s always worth stopping in. But most people that know me, know that I am completely addicted to Coca-Cola. Not even afraid to admit it. I mean, after all they say admitting your addictions is the first step to getting rid of them. So, if I ever to decide to give it up, I’ve already taken the first step!
But Atlanta recently opened the Coca-Cola museum. How green is my valley? So, when I got to come see you last year, my mom and I spent some time there and this summer, on my nieces annual trip to visit Aunt Niecy, we took them to the museum again. So, yeah, Atlanta now holds a much deeper appreciation for me…
You said that it has been difficult to blog I'm so glad that you have pushed through that block. Your writing is very moving,thought provoking,motivational; you bring scripture to life. Where do you get your inspiration to write like that?
I bucked blogging for quite a while. Now I blog for three different blogs! For me I just have trouble coming to terms with the fact that people care what you think. That people actually read them. Probably because I don’t read any blogs…When I started my first blog Where Living and Life Meet it was really just to stay connected with my readers until a new book came out. I thought it would be light, fun, just information kind of like my monthly newsletter. But it quickly changed into more of a teaching blog.
I’ve always had a deep passion for the word of God. That has been accentuated through my years of teaching Sunday School, speaking at churches, women’s conferences and for the Billy Graham Association. About seven years ago I went through a two year Bible Leadership program and have just continued to study the Bible. I’ve taught a Community Bible Study for the last four years and trust me, teaching the Word of God teaches the teacher!
In the October Newsletter you've mentioned that you are starting a NEW BLOG!You said that the blog will be called "Flying Solo". Your description of the blog will be written with "singles" in mind. Singles of all kinds, widowed, divorced, always single, young singles. Would you like to elaborate on where your new blog is headed? What do you hope God will accomplish through you and your blog? Please Explain?

This blog came out of my most personal pain. In the summer of 07 I walked through the heartbreaking loss of my thirteen year marriage. It was painful in the deepest sense of the word. But I made some decisions in the very beginning of that journey. The first one was, the enemy may have stolen my marriage, but he wouldn’t rob another day from me through anger or bitterness. The other one was I found an amazing counselor who walked the journey out with me so well. When I first went in his office I said, “I want to do whatever I need to to get through this journey well, because I don’t want to be a year down the road still having to heal from bitter and broken places. So, I entered head first into my grief. I didn’t get to “free parking” and take a free ride back to “Go.” I stopped at every place, grieved it, yelled through it, laughed through it and experienced every part of it.
I’ve thought often through this journey how there was so much to be shared through it. So, back in August, I was in Poland to minister at a church and was just getting ready one morning when the idea of beginning a blog for singles came to me. Every idea for it came to me that morning and when I got home one of my precious friends committed to working the blog for me and we’ve been amazed at the response. See, what I’ve discovered is that people who are any stage of singleness often wish this time away in longing for a mate. Instead of realizing that this is the only season in their life when God can have them all to Himself. What a privilige!
So, that was the goal, to remind people of the joy that this journey of “Flying Solo” can actually be. So the blog is simply a place for people to learn, laugh and participate! My counselor does a Q&A with me every Friday, which I tell everyone is worth the price for admission! Free counseling! You’ve got to be kidding me! I’m always a “serve where you’re planted” kind of girl. And I am now divorced. Boy, that took a long time to come to terms with. But starting this blog “Flying Solo” has allowed me to claim that, and hopefully help others claim the beauty that being single can be.

By the sounds of your summer and beyond you have been (almost) everywhere.You have been from Paradise Island, Bahamas to Koszalin, Poland. And almost everywhere in-between. What were the places that stood out to you this year? What place would you most definitely go back to and why? You showed pictures of some different food you ate overseas – what was one food that you had never tried before that you just loved? What food and event surprised you on your trip?
It has been a wonderful year. Honestly, it has been the most difficult and most beautiful year and a half of my life. I love to travel. I’ve done it continually for the last fifteen years and I’m privileged every time I get to experience something new. I have really become an “embrace every moment” person. I just breathe it in and enjoy everything that it has to offer.
My trip to the Bahamas that I took in September really was a special trip for me in so many ways. It was a trip of personal healing. About thirteen years ago, during my first year of marriage, my husband and I at the time had traveled there and so I was really dreading going back to a certain extent. It was such a wonderful memory for me. But when I got there, the incredible hotel we had stayed in that had all those wonderful memories was boarded up, looked tired and worn down and I heard the sweet voice of my Father whisper, “Memory Closed. Time to make new ones.” That moment was a healing that I didn’t even know I needed. And so powerful.
It also was a reflection of something I’ve come to talk about this year about “Alive Moments”. I’ve had to learn how to live again. How to embrace life. And enjoy the moments it affords. And sometimes embracing life even means accepting those painful places too. For me, this was one of those moments. And I was alive in that pain knowing that it is going to lead me to another beautiful place.

That trip also gave me the idea for a new book that I’m about seventy-five pages into. And no, I’m not giving a lick of it away!
And this was the trip where I ate sushi for the first time! Can’t say I liked it, but I did it. That for me was huge!
In your newsletter you have also asked for prayer and discernment for the New Adventure that the Lord is taken you in and the new vision he has given you in an outreach for broken women? What does your heart long for in this ministry area? What vision had the Lord given you for these women?
I’ve always had a heart for hurting people. A lot of that has to do with my own personal story and what I’ve walked through. But about six years ago, when I was working on my second Savannah book, Savannah comes Undone I was in Savannah working and just had a vision placed in my heart about going there and doing an event that would change the heart of the women of that city.

In May of this year I finally had the “how” given to me to go with the “what” I had received six years ago. That is culminating in what we’re calling “The Whole Woman Revolution.” We will begin it here in Franklin on January 21st. We will also introduce our women to organizations in our very own city who are touching and changing the lives of broken women. My desire is that we link arms with them and together we impact lives in an even greater regard. We have got to get to the place where we are not simply consumers but world changers. My desire is to help the women of my city learn how to give to the women of my city. If we remind just one heart of her value that will be worth the entire journey!
I know from hearing you speak that you set out to be a singer not a author and how God orchestrated you to write the books you have; where do you see yourself in 5 years? What hat do you like to wear the most? Why?
Yes, ole Denise came to Nashville to be a singer, and no one wanted to hear me sing. Which is apparently a prerequisit for a record deal! But what I discovered was just as the Lord says in Revelations 3:7 to the church at Philadelphia that “He opens doors, and no one can shut them; he shuts doors, and no one can open them.” I have come to a place in life where I thank him as much for his closed doors as I do for his opened doors. Almost seventeen years ago, a woman read a story that I had written about her organization and asked me to come finish the book she had written. That began a writing journey that has changed my life.

The fourteen rejection letters I received on a non-fiction book I had written convinced me to give a try at writing fiction that ended up in being my first book Savannah from Savannah that received two book offers.
The trials in my life led me to deep places with the Lord. And those deep places gave me a hunger for His presence and His word and opened doors for me to minister that word that dwells on the inside of me.

My desire in five years is to be in the middle of what God is doing. I want to still be touching people in their broken places no matter what that looks like for me during that season. My prayer is that I never become irrelevant. But that my life is always relevant to where God is moving. Because He is always moving!

QUESTIONS YOU WERE AFRAID TO ASK DENISE, SO I DID!!

1. If you were trapped in a dangerous and life threatening situation, which fictional character would you choose to save your life? (this could be a cartoon, comic book character, a super hero, a movie persona, etc. ) Why them?

Jack Bauer! He can save anyone and he can do it in 24 hours! So, thank the Lord my life threatening situation wouldn’t last long!

2. What two places do you love to shop? Why?

A Book Store - I can't leave without something.
Target- I could go broke there!

3.What special quality or talent do you have that would surprise people? What special event have you experienced that would surprise people?

(Denise can do this naturally - she doesn't need help)

I can raise my right eyebrow. It drives people crazy.

Special Event? I was a finalist and talent winner in the Miss South Carolina pageant when big hair ruled!

4.If you had all the time in the world (and just as much money); to do ANYTHING you wanted, what would you do?

I would do things for people anonymously. I’ve always dreamed of being able to pay off people’s mortgages. I remember the day my parent’s mortgage was paid off and the freedom that gave their life. If had all the money I wanted, I would want to see that kind of freedom for people.
Of course that would include the house on the beach that I would buy myself, so I could spend the rest of my years reading good books, drinking Coca-Cola and enjoying the most beautiful sight on earth.

5.If you could hang out with or interview two people (in the history of the world) for 48 hours who would you pick and why?
I know people expect me to say Jesus, but I’m figuring we’ll get eternity together so, I have two others.
C.S. Lewis. I don’t know separate of Jesus who I admire more for the treasures he left us. His novels, his non-fiction. What an amazing man. I never tire of reading his work.

His wife Joy- I don’t know that a woman was more loved. I’d love to know what her journey with this man was like.

6.If you found a magic lamp and the genie inside was going to grant you three wishes, what would your wishes be?

(Denise's Mom - enjoying her daughter reading from Savannah from Savannah)
That my family would stay safe and healthy- That can’t count for two!
That my two shih-tzu’s Maggie (Age 14) and Sophie (Age 2 and more trouble by the day) could live forever.
That I could have a Coca-Cola Fountain Machine, like they have at the Coca-Cola Museum, for my house! You thought I was going to say World Peace didn't you, just because I was in a pageant!

7. What film to you remember seeing as a child that really impacted you?

No doubt- Roots. I’ll never forget watching this movie with my parents. I had no idea the depth of what I was seeing. But that movie changed me forever.

8. What are some of your favorite books you read as a child?
I loved “Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing.” Probably because I was about that age when my little brother came along and I could just so relate to the trials of having a little terror.
I also loved “Where the Wild things Are.” Which was odd since I was scared of my shadow as a kid. Hey, wonder if that was why!

9. What two TV shows were you passionate about as a child? (you know the shows you couldn't miss each week).
Oh- The Brady Bunch of course. Couldn’t miss it. And the Donny and Marie show. I was going to marry Donny you know…And am counting the days until I go see him in Vegas in March! Wonder if he'll see me and wonder where I've been all his life?
10. If you had to be a super hero for a while who would you be and why? (you can mix and match the powers and make up your own clothing line (Ha!) you are the author here – be creative).

I would have the beauty of Wonder Woman, the agility of Spider Man, the Batmobile of Batman - preferably with George Clooney as Batman in the passenger seat, the hearing of The Bionic Man, and the clothes of Charley’s Angels! Hey, they were super.
THANK YOU Denise for hanging out with me today. I appreciate that you have helped my readers get to know you better. Thanks also for sharing where the Lord has you and the ministries He has laid on your heart. It’s hard to find all these things in a book club setting.
ARE THERE ANY FINAL COMMENTS THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO LEAVE MY READERS WITH???
Thank you for giving me this opportunity...Nora, It's such wonderful news about your parents. I am so glad God is moving in such a sweet way in their life and you are getting to experience that. You are a precious lady and so is your mama!
Blessings on your writing and the journey the Lord has you on friend. I hope it beings you back to Atlanta and book club!!
Nora :D

Why my brother won't go with me on the Amazing Race

2009-01-13T06:55:00.004-06:00

Last week I posted a blog on southernauthors.blogspot.com about "Why I wanted to go on the Amazing Race." Actually a couple of years ago me and my baby brother did send in an audition video but we weren't accepted. Apparently he is very grateful because after my blog posted on Facebook he had a rather typical brother response. I thought I'd share both my blog and his with you and you can judge for yourself why it took me years to like him. After all I had been the baby for eight years when he showed up as a "surprise". I called him an "accident", my mother changed it to "surprise." I can say that he is right though. If he did go with me on there he would probably ruin any chance of a church having me back for a women's conference....And for the record, if they would have chosen us years ago, he wouldn't have said no...

Why I want to go on the Amazing Race

If you knew me, you'd know that the mere thought of me being on the Amazing Race is absurd. I travel with my own sheets and Lysol. I am very particular about where I stay. And when I went to Romania, well, let's just say thank the Lord I had me some cheese crackers!

But there is something inside of me that so wants to be on the amazing race. However, I would have to have a partner who isn't afraid of heights, will eat anything and can speak most languages and is well versed in "nasty". Because some people can just be plain nasty! And I'm a southerner, we don't do nasty. We do sweet as pie to your face and do "nasty" behind your back. Well, some do. Not me.

I mean serious, if I got to a challenge and had to bungie jump, well, you'd have to just knock me out and push me over because that's the only way I'd go. Or, if they stuck pig brain or, or, well, I can't imagine anything worse...but if they stuck that in front of me and said bon'appetite, I'd say, "If he don't come fried I ain't eatin' him!" And if I got to a road block and they told me I had to shave off my hair, well, I did think Demi Moore looked cool in G.I. Jane, but sister doesn't have her face, and I've grown fond of my locks, so I'd have to turn around and go all the way back.

The trouble is there is no one willing to go with me. No one wants to share this adventure! I can't understand why. I don't cry often. I throw fits only when necessary. And I'm almost over my fear of packed trains in India! So, I think I'd be a perfect partner.

It is a new year. The Amazing Race is accepting applications. And I do know both of my brother's social security numbers. So, what they know won't hurt them.

But if I never make it on the television show I have determined that this year is going to be an Amazing Race for me. Everyday. I'm going to eat things I've never eaten before. Did that new years day actually. Ate collards! I know I'm southern, but I never liked collards. But poured hot pepper vinegar over those things and I was like wow! I'm going to jump off of something this year! Maybe a hotel bed, or my sofa, but I'm jumping off of something! And I'm going to travel somewhere odd. Somewhere I've never been. Hey, I've never been to Washington State. Last person I saw come out of there looked kind of odd.

But no matter what it's going to be a race and it's going to be Amazing! Hope to see you along the way...

Damon's Response
Why I have Reservations about going with my sister on the Amazing Race:

Ok,

So my sister has said that she wants to go on Amazing Race (http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=48874241346) . Some of you may ask why I have told her I won't go with her. Let me give you a couple of reasons...

1. On a past stay in a hotel she insisted on sleeping ON TOP of her roommate in order to prevent any diseases from the sheets. She didn't put something else down she felt would be cleaner, she slept ON TOP of her roommate.

2. When she starts her car, other cars in her city begin to shake uncontrollably. The Franklin police have actually installed tracking devices on her car, and shut down city blocks while awaiting her arrival. I don't know what the penalty in Korea is for hitting a pedestrian, but I seem to remember a young man getting caned in the 90's for spray painting a car in a foreign country and can't imagine the punishment for rendering someone's legs useless would be much more lenient.

3. When is the last time you saw her in flats? Seriously? Do you think we could pull a wagon full of cow poo across a city with her in Prada pumps?

4. Her ministry. While I have no doubt that her testimony would remain in tact, I fear that it may be hampered by my inability to refrain from 4 letter eloquence if she were to refuse to shave her head, run fast enough, take a wrong turn, or run over an old lady resulting in my caning.

5. We would have to fly. I know some of you have traveled with her, but have any of you ever flown with her? In the past she has held the hands of complete strangers due to flight fright. I am not someone who gets nervous on planes. But if you have ever sat beside her on a flight with any turbulence, you immediately think you are going to lose both wings, decompress and end up the size of the little black box when impact occurs. I've only watched a couple of episodes and on each one I've seen them get on some form of aircraft. I would fear that what little hair I have left would end up looking like mange if I were to have to fly the friendly skies repeatedly with Doomsday Mary at my side.

All of this being said I must make it clear that I love my sister dearly. She cooks amazing meals, she loves to watch our baby girl when Sarah and I have date nights, and when you need someone to pray for you there isn't anyone much better. But if I have to saddle up my horses and ride into the competition sunset with her at my side, I fear our relationship may suffer irreparable damage.

After reading all of this, if she still feels that we have a shot, I will find someone to script and shoot the video and we will take the venture into the unknown.

January Newsletter

2009-01-05T18:26:00.022-06:00

January Newsletter
Well, the new year is here. So is my diet. How one person can consume so many cokes is beyond my power of imagination. But between the Cokes, four trips to Leo's for chicken wings and mama's fried chicken on New Year's Day! Well, let's just say, those blue jeans I got for Christmas might should have been a size larger! December welcomed us with our first snow fall. It was beautiful and too quick. This is the shot out of my front door. It had the biggest flakes and I felt like a little girl! If it's going to be cold, I would at least rather it snow. I also joined Facebook. Might be the craziest decision I've ever made. Like I didn't have enough e-mail to respond to, now I've got more friends then I know. But I love it! So, if you're not my friend yet, get on there and become my friend. I've found friends that I haven't talked to in over twenty years! I know, I can't believe I could know people that old, but it's true. Before I left to go home I had a wonderful evening at my neighbor's Dave and Patti Libardi. And let me tell you it was wonderful. Dave is Italian and he made some meatballs that were the best thing I have ever eaten. Two of their three beautiful daughters were home for the festivities and oodles of neighbors came by. And oh, there was dancing! I mean well, sort of. One of our neighbors shook a leg, well, not quite like I've ever seen one shook! I also celebrated Christmas with my brother and his wife and baby Georgia. They gave me one of the most thoughtful gifts. A newspaper headline from the day I was born. How cool is that! And I gave Georgia her second Olivia book. Look how much she loved it. And me and Maggie and Sophie took our Christmas picture! The best moments were those at home. I spent about two weeks at home with my family and the first stop of course as soon as dropped Maggie and Sophie off at mom and dad's was to head to Leo's. That's why I've got such a big smile! Christmas Eve had us doing the brother and sister, aunt and nieces and nephew gift exchange. It had us celebrating Maggie's 14th birthday and celebrating dad actually getting in the kitchen. He makes the best steamed shrimp ever! Add to that french fries and mom's cole slaw and rolls and you don't need anything else but an elastic band on your britches... Christmas morning actually found me spending it with my parents all by myself. That is the first time that has ever happened in my life. Both my brothers have spent Christmas mornings with my parents by themselves but I had never done that. We had such a wonderful and relaxed time and it doesn't matter how old you are you still feel like a kid on Christmas! Of course it was only relaxed for a little while because we headed to my brother's for lunch and it was Wii mania! New Years Eve was all girls all day! What a perfect day we had. Me and Hannah, Lauren and Abigail and Mom had lunch with our old and wonderful friends Johnny and Annah Deal and their two beautiful daughters. (still could kick myself for not getting a picture of us!) Then us girls headed to watch "Bedtime Stories" at the movies. Left there and went to the bowling alley and then headed for Pizza! By the time the ball got ready to drop we were all about to drop. But I made it! First time in years! But probably because it was technically only 11 at my house in Nashville. Mom missed it by 10 minutes. She almost made it! But it was a wonderful year! My prayer is that your year and holidays were filled with as many wonderful memories as we had. I can only imagine what 09 holds. I believing for amazing things!

Alive Moment
For me nothing makes me more alive then being with my nieces and nephews. Honestly. At this point in my life I have not been blessed with children. But I honestly don't know how I could love them any more than I love these. These past two months have given me the opportunity to be with my older brother's children a lot more than I usually have time for. Even Jake and Aunt Niecy had their first sleep over! Having baby Georgia here in Nashville has been the icing on the cake. I've spent my entire life being away from nieces and nephew until she arrived. Hannah will be 13 in just a couple months! Lord have mercy, I can't believe that! Whenever she gives one of her quick witted comments I feel alive. Lauren will be 11 in just a couple months. Whenever she comes up and asks if she can do something for you with her servant heart I come alive. Abigail will be 7 in just three days! And whenever that child laughs or impersonates Elvis, I come alive. Jake will be 5 in a couple months. And every time he slaps that baseball cap over his red locks and gives me that look, I come alive. Georgia just turned 7 months. And every time she smiles I come alive.
I can't imagine the feeling if they were my own. But every day I pray for them. That they'll be protected and wise. Every day I pray that they'll know God at an early age and never turn they're hearts away from that knowledge. And every day I thank God that since life has yet to offer me the privilege of a child, He has been gracious enough to give me five that I love as my own. Thank you for letting me share that. May the love of a child help you feel alive too.

January Book Pick
I always do things a little different at the beginning of the year. I just set aside some time to reflect. So, this year I'm rereading "Purpose Driven Life." If you've never read it please do. If you read it a few years back it's a message that never grows old!

The Whole Woman Revolution begins January 21st!
If you're anywhere near Franklin, Tennessee and want to join us on Wednesday mornings for a Bible Study that I will be teaching just send us an e-mail at revolution@denisehildreth.com and we'll send you some more information! It's going to be an amazing study and a perfect way to begin the new year!

January Dates
January 30th 6:30 PM Northside Christian Church
1300 George Washington Memorial HWY. Yorktown, VA 23693
If you're in the area please join us!

To look into having Denise come to your church or next women's event e-mail her at denise@denisehildreth.com

Saying Goodbye to 2008

2008-12-29T16:52:00.004-06:00

In a couple days we’ll bring in a New Year. There is always something about that marker that gets me excited. I usually start a new devotional. Spend some time the first of each year focusing on the Lord and what He wants to say to me for that new year and setting the tone for the year to come. But I also spend time reflecting. Which is what I was doing last night.

My dad is repainting his office and had taken all of his books down from his book shelf. So, he had me and my older brother come over and go through them. Over forty-five years of ministering were on those shelves. And I honestly don’t know how I’m going to get all the ones I picked out home. But he also had some old tapes of sermons that he had preached. So, I stuck a couple in my purse and listened to them last night when I had some time alone.

As one of them started it had me on there singing a song, yes, I know, me singing, but yep, use to do that every now and then. And what I found were the words to that song far more relevant now, some fifteen years later, than when they had originally been sung. They said:

He’s just as real to me.
As if I’d held His hand a million times.
And though I’ve never seen Him smile I know I’ve felt Him by my side.
These ears have never heard Him speak.
My heart has heard Him time and time again.
Just like a friend would be. He’s just as real to me.

When I recount this past year what I recount the most is how real God has been. I think so often it’s so easy to focus on where we don’t feel like He is working instead of taking time to realize where He is. I’ve discovered that it’s usually not that God isn’t working in my life, it’s that I’m not in the middle of what He ‘s doing. I’m trying to fit Him into my plans, instead of placing myself into the middle of His plans. Where is God moving? Because that’s where I want to be.

But He is moving. And He has moved. This year I’ve watched as He has protected me, provided for me, met me in my lonely moments and been a companion to me. I’ve seen the times where He’s spoken to my heart so beautifully. Not just through His word things that have challenged me. But to my heart, to those specific places. Those places only He knows.

One came recently on a Sunday evening. Everyone had gone home after we had watched the Titans game and I just felt that tug on my heart that He wanted to spend time with me. So, I went to that old familiar spot we have, my little path that goes through the foyer, dining room and around the front hall. And I began to walk, and we began to talk. And in that moment I felt Him speak something so precious to my heart about my future. So personal. So like a Father. And I found myself a heap on the floor. And when I got up, I said, “Well, that sure beats the other times I’ve been a heap in this floor.” Because trust me, the other times with my face in the carpet weren’t happy tears.

I’ve found Him a lot in the morning hours too. When I’m waking up, before the day has started, I feel that whisper not to cut on the TV. Just to lie there a while and talk with Him. And I’ve been amazed how much in those moments He has whispered to my heart.

The new year offers you and I a clean slate, so to speak. I’m not talking resolutions. I think life should always be about turning and changing and growing and learning. But a moment to get out a new calendar, pack up the old receipts of 08 and clean out the desk drawer. A moment to refocus, reevaluate and regroup. And it also offers us the opportunity to draw close to the one who desires to draw close to us.

As this old year closes down, take a few moments to recount all the ways God has been there in your life. Trust me, if you look, you’ll be able to see them. If you’re having trouble ask Him to help you. He loves to reveal Himself. And then as the new year opens take some time in the beginning of it to spend time with Him in a different way maybe than you have in the past. And let this new year give you what He so desires for you to have, a relationship that makes Him real to you.

Christmas-The Ultimate Gift

2008-12-22T00:00:00.000-06:00

On Thursday we will once again celebrate Christmas. A day that brought life like no other. But this past Thursday I sat ina small room, in a small church on the outskirts of my small town. The women there were different from me in many ways. Some sat in this room because they had been commanded by the courts because of alcohol abuse. Others sat in the room because of drug abuse. I sat slightly behind the table and listened as the women recounted their Christmas traditions. I was amazed to find that some had none. Not one.

They didn't have the tradition like me and my family of Christmas eve where we gather around the table and eat steamed shrimp, french fries, Darlyn's homemade coleslaw and rolls. They didn't have a tradition of after that dinner, sitting in the family room as all of us siblings and my nieces and nephews exchange our gifts. They didn't have the tradition of going to Walmart on Christmas Eve and seeing half of Camden and buying stocking stuffers. They didn't have the tradition of waking up on Christmas morning, eating mom's chocolate gravy and biscuits and going around the room as one person at a time opened a present. Or my own personal tradition that I've started of waking up before anyone else and reading my devotion and writing down all the amazing things God has done for me and my family the previous year.

No, many of them had no traditions. But we were alike too. We all stood in need of the gift that was given some two thousand years ago. Desperate need. Not one of us was good enough. No matter what demons we fight. At the end of the day we could have been shepherd's or wisemen, Mary or Joseph, Herod or Pilot. We could have been vagrants or Kings, but this same Jesus had to come for each of us. I don't know what you're family traditions are. I do know it's never too late to start one. And if you've never taken a moment to let this Savior of the world inhabit even the farthest corners of your soul, this would be a perfect time. He came for us. He left the perfection of heaven, to come to the pitiful state of earth and reach us in our humanness. Like the song says, "It was a strange way to save the world." But I'm so glad He did. As I recount the things I'm thankful for Christmas morning, once again I'll be thanking Him for what He did for me that Christmas morning. I honestly can't imagine how long God must have held his hand before He finally released Him to earth. I can't imagine the great heartache to know what He was sending His son to do. But God's love for you and me was why He let Him come. And I'm so grateful that He did...

It's a Wonderful Life

2008-12-15T19:35:00.000-06:00

"I want to live again! Please God, let me live again." I've listened to George Bailey say those words multiple times over the last couple of days. Even though I'm ashamed to admit that last year was the first year I had ever watched It's a Wonderful Life all the way through. Apparently, this Saturday night when it came on all members of my family were watching it. Me in Franklin, my brother and his wife, for the first time through as well, at their home in Nashville. My parents, for the first time through, at their home in Camden, SC and my brother and his wife , not sure if it was their first time, at their home in Lexington, SC. So the entire clan was listening as George leaned over the iron railing of the bridge and told God he wanted to live again.

It made me wonder how many times God hears those words. Probably not as often as he hears the desperate pleas of many to take them away from their pain. But George had the benefit you and I have never had. George was given the ability to see what life would have been like without him.

Now, I'm no big deal. Trust me, I'm very aware of who I am. But I asked myself as I turned the television off, "What would have been lost if I had never been born?" Granted my two brother's would have had a much more peaceful life, but would the world miss me? That took me to an even bigger question. "Am I living to my greatest potential."

I remember having my own George Bailey moment many months ago, except I wasn't hanging over a railing, I was probably face down in the carpet. Even though I had lived the best I knew, I also was very aware that there was a level of living that I had never known. Truly embracing life. Enjoying it. Laughing through it. Crying through it if needed. But living it and making no apologies for it.

For those of you who have walked with me over this past year together you know that has been the message of my heart. Life is about living. And in the living we're called to do are we reaching our potential? Are we impacting lives or taking up space? Are we contributing, growing, learning, thriving, or are we moaning, complaining, and settling.

There could have been a world without us. But there wasn't. Why? Because God knew that the world needed us. You and I were created because heaven saw value in our living. Not our existing. But in our living. So go out there and live! Enjoy this holiday season. Grab friends and walk through the packed mall. Enjoy that piece of pumpkin pie with no regrets. Go to a Christmas Musical and let the music lift your soul. Turn the radio on in the car and sing those Christmas songs to the top of your lungs. Love someone who seems unlovely. Feed someone who is hungry. Risk giving your heart away to someone who wants to love you in return even though someone didn't protect it in the past. Sit around the table with your family and talk about what life means because you've walked it with each other. And watch It's a Wonderful life for the first time or the 50th. And when you watch George discover what life would have been like without him, take a moment to think about what life would have been like without you.

Because it wouldn't be the same...And Clarence might not have gotten his wings...

Potential Lost

2008-12-07T07:52:00.003-06:00

O.J. Simpson and his story are attached to major invents in my life. His ex-wife Nicole was murdered the day after I got married. On my honeymoon, one of the only English speaking channels was CNN. So for 10 days, it was all Simpson all the time. Every second of the White Bronco chase I saw. The day the innocent verdict of the double murder trial came in I was in a hospital waiting room where my father was seriously ill.

As I watched him on Thursday, stand in front of a judge for a second time, but this time in chains, handcuffs and a prison uniform, I wondered how a two time All-American, Heismann Trophy winner and NFL Hall of Famer could fall so far. Yet it happens so many times. A life destined for greatness squanders its potential.

Often what I learn from others isn't what I should do. If I'm being honest, lives that I desire to truly emulate don't nearly stack up to the lives that I watch that teach me what I don't want to do. One of my pastors use to say, "Many people get to their destiny moments in life and their character destroys them when they get there." Oh, how sad, but oh how true.
Storms will eventually reveal the integrity of a structure. They will also strengthen it if we allow them to. The Bible says, "we glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; perseverance produces character and character hope."

As that verdict was read over O.J. Simpson's life, long gone was the cocky grin, the arrogant rantings, his eyes were now of a man whose hope had run out. Why? Because character produces hope. And he had reached the pinnacle and his character had found him wanting.

In a day and age where true character is getting harder and harder to come by, may we realize that very rarely does the loss of character happen in one life-changing decision. Very few people in jail cells woke up one morning and thought "Oh, I'll go out and rob a bank, murder my husband, rape a woman." Most character destruction begins small. It begins as we make concessions for sin. We find satisfaction with a virtual woman on a computer screen rather than our spouse. We go home with pens and post-it notes from the office thinking "I work hard enough, plus they'll never miss it." We let our home become a haven for our anger instead of a sanctuary to the lives we have been called to care for.

I believe that is why the Apostle Paul said in 2 Corinthians 10:5 to "take every thought captive." It's a new war. It's a war for a our affections. It's a war for our character. Are we armed? Because trust me, our enemy is. May you and I stand in our destiny moments and ten years, twenty years, thirty years later, still be standing there.

December Newsletter

2008-12-05T18:35:00.007-06:00

I thought I'd post my newsletter on here, since we've had so much trouble with the pictures showing up in the e-mail that I usually send out. My, my what a month November was. It went too fast and brought winter sweeping in with it. There wasn't a glimpse of fall to be found. Nope, straight to winter.
It began with a wonderful trip to Tabernacle Baptist Church in Cartersville, GA. What a wonderful time we had together. Two evenings of great food, wonderful music, a sweet word from the Lord and some of the sweetest women I've ever met. My friends' Angie and Jineen, who are sister-in-laws, took to the highways with me, where we ate sweets, drank coca-cola and solved all of the world's problems in the three and half hour trip. I took them to my favorite restaurant in Atlanta, Buckhead Diner, we did some shopping at the mall and had a wonderful time.
(Angie and Jineen)
I also had the privilege of meeting a precious lady, Susan Kennedy, who has been an e-mail encourager to me for months now. It started one day when she sent an e-mail at just the right time, saying just the right thing e-mails let to a special friendship and the reason I had the privilege to be at her wonderful church. She is truly an example of a woman who operates in her gifting. She has sent countless e-mails of encouragement to me and God has used her in such a special way to impact my life.

I took the trip to South Carolina for the Thanksgiving holidays to spend some time with my family. There are some wonderful things about going home, mama's cooking, Leo chicken wings, seeing my nieces and nephews. I have three nieces and a nephew that I just don't get to see enough. So, anytime I get the opportunity to love on them, I take advantage of every moment. Regardless of the fact that all of that loving has given me my 2nd round of bronchitis in two months...worth every bit of it. It also gives me the opportunity to spend time with my older brother and my sister-in-law. Something that I cherish. Many of the childhood stories in "Flies on the Butter" are some of mine and Darren's best memories. The good ones only...plus he's my favorite brother because he is a Gamecock fan. We still aren't sure where Damon got so screwed up.

Mom pulls out all the stops on Thanksgiving. There is enough food to feed the neighborhood, but we enjoy enjoying it. We've got it all, turkey, fried turkey mind you, yep, we're southerners, ham, rice and gravy, butter beans, corn, sweet potato souffle, collards, (still can't eat those) and more desserts than we need. Even though she spent the rest of the week convincing us we needed to eat more.

The kids sit at the kids table, so glad I'm not there anymore, the grownups sit at the grown up table and Georgia just sat wherever she wanted to and when it was all over dad did exactly what any good dad would do. He helped mom with the dishes...You've got to be kidding me! Something about this picture is slightly scary...Maybe it's the way he crossed his hands.

The day after Thanksgiving we had a packed day. Damon, Sarah and I headed out for some horseback riding with our precious friends, Julia and Clarence. They once again, shared their precious horses with us, but this time Julia gave me one that didn't quite bruise my booty like Ole Dee did last year. My word, I couldn't walk for three days after that. Seriously, I had to speak that Sunday morning at my dad's church, and I wasn't even sure I was going to be able to walk up to the platform.

The full story of our journey is posted below this. Trust me, it was full of all kinds of experiences, a trip through the woods, that had no path, Monkey just made his own, as well as a bathroom excursion in the woods that Sarah and I took while Damon waited patiently. Gotta do what you gotta do. And I did hurt for two days, but not three. So, we're grateful for the improvement.

Then we headed out for the Family's Turkey Bowl Off. We do this every year, even though I can't ever remember who wins. I guess it's clear that I don't. I'm thinking I would remember that. Nana went head to head with Hannah. Not really good for any of us, because all three of my brother's girls are on a bowling league. Even the little one now. Thankfully I had two of them on my team and it didn't do me a lick of good. That's why I finally went to the Granny bowling technique. Which honestly, didn't work out much better for me either.

Saturday had us doing the other things the family loves to do Thanksgiving weekend. Shopping...My wonderful friend Joan and her husband John came up from Charleston, and off we went to Charleston to enjoy a wonderful day of catching the sales. Georgia even got into the event for her first Thanksgiving weekend shopping trip. And she was styling to boot!
It honestly was a perfect month. From beginning to end. I pray your Thanksgiving blessed you too. I hope you ate till you were stuffed, laughed until you cried, and we're thankful for things you had even forgotten about. In case you didn't take time to remember, take a few moments now. It will remind you of how in spite of what a tough year it's been for some, there is still much to be thankful for.

Alive Moment
This month's alive moment was experienced with my mother. I have people ask me all the time, "Is you're mother like Victoria in the Savannah series?" I laugh. Then I say, "Only the good parts." My mother and I are alike in a lot of ways. Like this frightening picture that was taken of us that we didn't know about. But we are different in a lot of ways. And she is like Victoria in many ways.
Yes, my mother has to be fully accessorized by seven am. She never goes any where with out heels on and I think she owned one pair of jeans years ago that she wore once. Until the Saturday after Thanksgiving. I'm not sure what switch flipped inside of her after all these years, but she saw Joan in a cute pair of jeans and she said, "Where did you get those?"
I saw my window. And trust me, sister has learned when to take advantage of her windows. I said, "You know, you'd love some jeans if you'd just try them on." And that was when she said it, "I think I want to go try some on." Well, honey no dust settled on that. I took her straight to Ann Taylor and had six pairs of jeans in her hands before she could protest.
I went into the dressing room and watched as my mother put on jeans! Jeans! It was fabulous. I was giddy. And she liked them. She liked them so much she I went into the dressing room and watched as my mother put on jeans! Jeans! It was fabulous. I was giddy. And she liked them. She liked them so much she put them on as soon as we got home and wore them all evening then put them on the next day and wore them again. There are moments in life that are life changing, transforming you to the core. There are other moment that are simply sweet, longing to be enjoyed. This was one of those moment. My mama in jeans. She looked good too! And I felt alive watching her do something I didn't think I'd ever see. You go mama! Now, if I can just get you into tennis shoes!

(Look at that smile!)

December Book Pick
The book pick for this month is Skipping Christmas featured in the right hand column at the top of the page. I read this a few years back and then the movie, Christmas with the Kranks came out, which is absolutely hysterical. If you can't read the book at least rent the movie. It is delightful and perfect for the whole family.

My heartfelt wishes to you for a wonderful Christmas. May our hearts take a few moments this season to remember why we celebrate, those less fortunate and that the greatest gift we ever received came 2000 years ago, and changed the world. And my life...blessings to each of you. Thank you for being my precious friends. Oh, what will the new year have in store! I can't wait to find out.

Lessons from Monkey...

2008-12-02T09:32:00.001-06:00

Monkey's owner, Julia, chose him for me. After my outing last Thanksgiving, and the brutal pain I was in for three days, she wanted to give me a smoother horse. Monkey's a Paso with a smoother gate I was told. He wouldn't beat me to death when he trotted or galloped. What I didn't know, and Julia didn't either is all Monkey would remind me of on our two hour journey through one of the most beautiful horse trails Camden has to offer.

His first lesson. Always stand up straight. You look regal that way. At 5'2 it's kind of hard for me to look regal, but he let me know it really can do wonders for you. Now my mother hounded this into me from the time I was a kid, but sometimes you've got to see others do it, to truly realize it matters. Monkey reminded me it definitely does.

He also taught me that sometimes it's just plain fun to run. Monkey likes to run. He thought walking was for sissy's. Little did he know he was carrying a sissy. But by the time we got to the end of our journey, I was enjoying him running too. Too much of life is spent just existing. Running can be a joy. Run some this holiday! Live! Get out there in the middle of the mall madness. It will make it feel like Christmas! Spend some time living...You might find you enjoy it. Even if you want to hibernate and hide out, you might be surprised what is waiting for you out there in the land of the living.

He taught me to eat whenever you feel like it. Not that I needed a huge lesson on this. I pretty much have this one down pat. But if we stopped, there wasn't a branch Monkey didn't want. And if he had to carry the entire limb with him as he walked, he was fine with that. But some of my best memories are around the dinner table. Eating, laughing, talking..enjoying...Take Time this holiday season to eat. We can diet in January!

He reminded me not to get busy to take a drink water. Granted he didn't care if his was bottled. Any old puddle would do. But that sometimes we get so busy in life that the necessary things become inconveniences. Even the necessary can be enjoyed.

He taught me that it's okay if you don't want to get dirty. So, now I'm completely free of any shame of traveling with my own sheets and carrying Lysol to spray down every nook and cranny of a hotel room. If a horse doesn't want to walk through mud, then I shouldn't feel bad about it either!
He also taught me that there is always a way around a mud hole too. Even if that path means you're going to have to knock down trees along the way. I wish he hadn't decided to do this with me riding him, but hey, he has an OCD issue about dirt. But as we barreled through those trees I realized that a lot of life is spent barreling through. But you know what, we weren't covered in mud when we finally got past there. Granted my hair was full of debris but I didn't have any mud on me!

He reminded me that life is a lot more fun traveling with a partner. Because I wouldn't have had half as much fun if he hadn't been taking that trail with me. And on top of that I'd have probably looked like an idiot!
And finally he taught me that some partners won't hurt you as bad as others. Now, I'm not going to say I didn't have a catch in my giddyup, come Saturday morning. But the pain was nowhere near as bad as the year before. No one is perfect. Life will bruise you along the way. But some people are much better partners on the journey of life than others. Choose wisely. Drink deeply. Laugh loudly. And remember that "faithful are the wounds of a friend." When it's a good friend like Monkey.

What I'm Thankful For - Part Two

2008-11-24T04:53:00.002-06:00

I'm thankful for memory. Especially when I get to a room and can't remember why I walked in there. Then, it hits me...and I think, "Whew, glad I remembered that."
I'm thankful Maggie will stare at me until I feed her in the moments when I don't remember.
I'm thankful for the people who have invested in my life when it offered them nothing much in return.
I'm thankful for those three hours dinners with my best friend and no lack of conversation.
I'm thankful that Leo decided to open a restaurant and make chicken wings.
I'm thankful for a season that makes us pause to remember what we're thankful for.
I'm thankful for the woman who created cute socks to sleep in.
I'm thankful for those days when the weather is so perfect that you have to drive around with the sunroof opened and the windows rolled down.
I'm thankful for the Gamecocks.
I'm thankful for people who found their words worth writing down and time in my day to read their books.
I'm thankful for travel size Lysol.

I'm thankful that Jack's back. (Well at least he was last night for two hours and will be back for good in January.)
I'm thankful for makeup.

I'm thankful for Cromer's who makes the best boiled peanuts.

I'm thankful laughter, the kind that you feel in your gut and experience in your soul.
I'm thankful for tears that come right before healing takes place.
I'm thankful for people who are willing to be morticians, because Lord knows I would never do it!
I'm thankful every time I hear Maggie snore because that means she's still alive. (She's 14 on Christmas Eve...)
I'm thankful that Sophie doesn't care when baby Georgia pulls her hair.
I'm thankful that Georgia can laugh now because it is the most wonderful sound in the world...
I'm thankful for long car trips because it gives me time to catch up with old friends, listen to books on tape and sing to the top of my lungs.
I'm thankful for old friends who have known you since you were little and can reminisce with you about the "remember when..."
I'm thankful for my older brother who didn't mind taking me to school when he was a senior and I was a freshman. (So not cool...)
I'm thankful for my baby brother who I now like.
I'm thankful for my sister-in-laws who don't mind listening to me talk and both know how to make me laugh.
I'm thankful for my niece Hannah who is beautiful and so grown up.
I'm thankful for my niece Lauren who is compassionate and precious.
I'm thankful for my niece Abigail who does the best Elvis impersonation and whose voice I love to hear on the other end of the line.
I'm thankful for Jake who brought some testosterone to all that estrogen and whose smile can melt my heart.
I'm thankful for my mom who is a lady of grace and character, kindness and strength.
I'm thankful for my dad who is loving, funny and available.
And I'm thankful for my Heavenly Father who has fathered me this past season of my life in a way I've never been fathered before. Loved me to a depth of soul I didn't know existed inside of me. And healed me in a way there were days I didn't believe existed.
May each of us take time to remember all that we have to be thankful for. And may we take the time to tell those closest to us just what they mean to us. So, please know how thankful I am for you...

Happy Thanksgiving
Denise

What I'm Thankful For

2008-11-16T17:19:00.002-06:00

Since Thanksgiving is less than two weeks away, I wondered if we could spend them thinking about things we are thankful for. The idea came to me the other morning lying in bed with the cloud over my head about as gray as the cloud that loomed outside. I knew why it was there. It was that lovely week of PMS when all women take one moment to tell Eve how much they wish they could slap her. I'd ask for forgiveness when I was through, but I have to say there is a brief moment each month that it takes all I have to not despise the woman.

But as I was lying there I gave myself a task. Keep your eyes open for things to be grateful for. No complaining for the next two weeks. Only talking about what your thankful for. Now, granted this has been a year and a half of noticing all the beautiful places God has moved in my life in even a more real way than in years past, but this truly cognizant approach to my day had me quite amazed at all I saw. Here's my list for this past week. I challenge you to do the same this week and share with us what you noticed...

I'm thankful that I still PMS, because the alternative isn't that appealing at my age.
I'm thankful that the new lines around my eyes this year came from laughing.
I'm thankful for three hour car rides with friends who aren't afraid to be honest, vulnerable and don't mind that I have to go to the bathroom every hundred miles.
I'm thankful that babies smell so good and don't care if you make a fool out of yourself.
I'm thankful that my dogs are just as excited to see me after five minutes as they are after five days.
I'm thankful for strangers who risk becoming your friend.
I'm thankful for people who take their creativity and write songs that I can sing to the top of my lungs in my car.
I'm thankful for the homemade biscuits and peach preserves at Loveless Cafe.
I'm thankful for my precious neighbor Jane who thinks of me every time she bakes something.
I'm thankful for my sister-in-laws who call me just to talk.
I'm thankful that five people call me Aunt Niecy.
I'm thankful that someone thought the iPhone would be a good idea.
I'm thankful that my mom and dad are still living and have stayed together even during the difficult times.
I'm thankful that everyday I get to do what I love.
I'm thankful for fall and how God shows off what an artist he is.
I'm thankful for the old friends I've reconnected with on Facebook.
I'm thankful that no matter what I've been through God still finds me usable.
I'm thankful for socks that match my pj's to keep my feet from getting cold.
I'm thankful that death, divorce, and sickness don't have the final word over a life.
I'm thankful that there is a season to celebrate just a few reasons why I'm thankful.
And I'm thankful for people like you to share this amazing journey with.

Praying for a President

2008-11-10T10:00:00.001-06:00

As I watched President elect Obama give his speech in Grant Park after being elected President of the United States I watched as the tears rolled down the faces of so many there in attendance. I let mine fall as well; the historical achievement and statement of how far we have come would not be lost on me. The other thing that won’t be lost on me is my responsibility regarding this new President.

In my daily study I was reading I Timothy 2:1, 2 the day after the election. “First of all, then, I admonish and urge that petitions, prayers, intercessions and thanksgivings be offered on behalf of all men. For kings and all who are in positions of authority or high responsibility, that [outwardly] we may pass a quiet and undisturbed life [and inwardly] a peaceable one in all godliness and reverence and seriousness in every way.” (Amplified version)

No matter whom you voted for, the responsibility for each of us is the same. We have the responsibility to intercede for our new President. It would be more than redundant to say no President has faced tougher times. But it clearly exemplifies the great need for direction, wisdom and grace that our new President will need, so that we may “pass a quiet and undisturbed life and a peaceable one in all godliness and reverence and seriousness in every way.”

May God continue to turn our hearts toward Him and may we never forget how far we’ve come from the days when entire groups of people were relegated to balconies at movie theaters, back seats in buses and back pews in churches. May our words be kind after a season of divisiveness. We may not agree on all issues, but we can agree that we have each one been formed in the image of God and we can celebrate the huge stamp on history that last Tuesday left. On January 20th one President will leave the post and another will enter it. May the wisdom of God rest on that White House. May the grace of God lead our outgoing President in the remaining days and our incoming President in the days to come.

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2008-11-07T08:00:00.000-06:00

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The Prayer

2008-11-02T21:11:00.002-06:00

Lord,
Forgive us when we've held onto our money tighter than we've held to your hand.
Forgive us when we've let the hands of caring for the hurting, the hungry, the homeless fall to the government instead of the church.
Forgive us when we've fought harder to protect the lives of animals more than the lives of children.
Forgive us when we've allowed tolerance to become a word that means accepting sin.
Forgive us when we've rebuffed those who are bound by their sin, instead of lovingly and tirelessly walking with them to freedom.
Forgive us when we've held onto our religious traditions at the cost of valuing souls.
Forgive us when we've let our liberties turn into the very things that now hold us in bondage.
Forgive us when we've removed your name from our schools and then cursed you claiming you didn't protect our children.
Forgive us when we've accepted handouts from the government and our bodies were able to work for our own provision.
Forgive us when we've found you as the inconvenience in this world when we have been called to be foreigners and strangers in it.
Forgive us when we've allowed others to define our truth instead of the One who is the Truth.
Forgive us when we've lived our lives as if they were upside down. Calling that which is wrong, right. Calling that which is a lie, truth.
Forgive us when we haven't gone the extra mile, haven't fought the good fight, or haven't kept the faith.
Forgive us when we've gotten tired in the well doing.
Forgive us we pray.
And as we pray this prayer, may we now hear from you and may you heal our land.
We're in desperate need of healing.
We're divided as never before.
Broken as few have ever seen.
Desperate as we may never be again.
Basically Lord, we're in the perfect position for You. Hear the prayers of your people.
Forgive us.
Heal us.
Save us.
This is our prayer. And you the only one might enough to save.

So Help us God

2008-10-28T08:30:00.004-05:00

George Washington made the following statements:

“What students would learn in American schools above all is the religion of Jesus Christ.” [speech to the Delaware Indian Chiefs May 12, 1779]

"To the distinguished character of patriot, it should be our highest glory to add the more distinguished character of Christian" [May 2, 1778, at Valley Forge]

During his inauguration, Washington took the oath as prescribed by the Constitution but added several religious components to that official ceremony. Before taking his oath of office, he summoned a Bible on which to take the oath, added the words “So help me God!” to the end of the oath, then leaned over and kissed the Bible.

http://www.seekfind.net/GeorgeWashington.html
http://lcweb2.loc.gov/ammem/pihtml/pinotable.html

I was checking out a movie recently on "screenit.com." You can go there to find out the details of a movie before you see it. And a PG movie used the curse word G-d seven times. I couldn't believe it. A word that use to be found only in R movies has now become one of the only curse words allowed to be used in PG. I thought, "Did I sleep through something?" I found this to be a statement of a far greater truth. A truth that if those who are offended remain silent will eventually be the only truth that remains. That "while we're sleeping" every thing that we hold of value will be subtle and craftily brought to nothing.

I was in Atlanta two weeks ago at a conference where one of the speakers said, "America isn't making decisions that could lead to judgement, America is already in the judgement of the decisions it has made." I sat there letting these words resonate over and over in my mind and realized that this is probably true.

I remember when I was in middle school and the voice came over the loud speaker that we were going to have a moment of silent prayer, every head around me bowed. Now, whenever I substitute in public school and take my Bible, because I couldn't get up early enough to read it before I left, I wonder if a child is going to see me, tell the principle or their parent and they will ask me to either not come back or not to bring my Bible with me if I do. I remember when I was little Three's Company was the raciest show on television. And now we have homosexual relationships shown on regular television with normalacy. I remember when children were seen as a heritage of the Lord and God had created plans for us before we were even in our mother's wombs and now the rights of sea turtles are more protected than the rights of the unborn. I remember when there was a standard of right and wrong, black and white, truth and lies. And now there is a no standard, truth is relative.

The saddest statement in that entire paragraph? "I remember when..." With each day that has gone by over the last couple decades truth has been taken over by relativism. But it doesn't mean that truth has changed. Truth will never change. We're told in the Gospel of John that "God's word is truth." And it is that truth that will set us free.

In this political season our nation stands more divided than it ever has before. But I still believe that our salvation isn't found in politicians. It is found in the cross. And being obedient to the statutes of the Word of God. Granted we have an obligation. We have an obligation and a privilege to vote in this next election. And I think God has allowed the gods of this world to be exploited for the weak imitations that they are. The god of Wall Street has been revealed as the cheap imitation that he is when the storms of life have come. I've taught on storms for years. And my bible tells me that it doesn't matter how we build, wise or foolish, storms will come. The difference is the aftermath. Those who have built on the rock will still be standing, those that have built on the things of their flesh will collapse.

I won't tell you who to vote for. I will tell you however, that nations in the Bible usually got the leaders they deserved. What I will ask you to do is search the Word of God. Seek Him while He may be found. Because I can't help but wonder if as the last twenty years have continued to silence and repress the body of Christ, that there may come a time when we will find ourselves in prison once again for the cause of Christ.

In the words of George Washington, "So help us God..." Yes, God help us.

Vision-Worth Running For

2008-10-21T07:28:00.000-05:00

When I found Ms. T.J. Williams, the automotive teacher, the only thing not sticking out of the hood of the car was her head. I believe that was stuck somewhere inside the engine. When she finally came up for air she informed her students, "Tell Mrs. Anderson she needs a new alternator." I had originally met Ms. Williams a couple months ago at the open house for Maplewood High School in Nashville. She had told me then that her babies came into school hungry every morning so she had made a "snack table". I was there because my small group had decided we wanted to contribute to her "snack table." So I came bearing juices, granola bars, peanut butter and cheese crackers and Little Debbie cakes...mmm...

As we walked out to my car she was telling me what this place had been like just a little over a year ago. She had been called in to help pull this school out of its lowest ranking in all of metro county. She said when she arrived the teacher before her had stolen most all of the equipment that they did have. What he had left was broken and worn out. There were mattresses laying all around the garage because the past years of automotive classes were spent smoking dope and "hanging out". And she had one day to pull it all together. She picked up the phone to call a friend and tell her what it looked like. "But I have a vision for it." Ms. Williams said. Her friend told her, "Well, write it down then. Like it says in Habakkuk." So, write it down she did. She said, "I told the Lord I want all our equipment to be in red like the color of your blood."

"But I knew I wouldn't get all of that equipment by the next day when school started, so I had to start somewhere. So, I cleaned this place up, threw all those old mattresses away and let those babies know that it was a new day!"

And an even newer day when I got there. The best equipment you'd ever want to find in an automotive garage exists in Ms. Williams classroom. And what color do you think it is? You guessed it. Red! Everything is red. The Car lifts, the tool boxes, the tools. Not to mention the fully equipped classroom off of the garage with twenty personal computers and a "smart board." And she gave all the praise to Jesus.

When I had been pondering things worth running for, this same passage in Habakkuk had come up in my heart, not even knowing Ms. Williams would confirm it when I got to see her. But I thought about how vision is worth running for. Habakkuk 2:2 says, "Write the vision down. Make it plain on the tablets that those who read it will run with it."

Ever had a vision? Ever had something burning in your heart? Or how about this...Ever had a season without vision causing you to wonder what life was worth? That's why the scriptures say, "Where there is no vision the people perish." We were created for vision. We were created to dream and create and produce.

So, what's holding you back? Fear? The Economy? Waiting for November 4th? Your own feelings of inadequacy? Granted there are some visions that have a gestation process. But there also comes a time when vision has to be acted upon inspite of what is going on around you. Why does vision matter? Because vision breeds vision. When Ms. Williams cleaned up that garage and those students arrived they realized they were now worth more than dirty mattresses and dope! They realized they were worth the finest of tools, the finest of computers, and the best of teachers.

When I got to that garage I was met by derelicts. I was met by kids whose heads were stuck up under that hood with Ms. Williams. I was met by "yes mam," "thank you so much mam." Someone is waiting on your vision. Because I'll say it again, Vision Breeds Vision. Don't wait on utopia. We are never going to have heaven on earth until Jesus comes back and creates a new earth. So, why not bring a little bit of heaven into the hell that so many now live in. I'm going to get my journal because I've got a vision to write down...and when I'm done I'm putting on my running shoes...I'd love to pass you on the street...

Freedom-Worth Running For

2008-10-14T07:15:00.000-05:00

As I’ve been thinking this past week about those things worth running for, I reflected on the story in the Gospels, but specifically the account in Mark, about the demon-possessed man who lived in the tombs. There aren’t a lot of accounts in the Bible where people actually ran. That’s why I think this one touched me so much this week. Because what I see in this story is how the freedom of our soul is worth running for.

Jesus has just spent the night out on the boat with his disciples. A storm had come up and they were petrified and he had stopped the storm and reprimanded his boys over their lack of faith. And now it’s morning and Jesus steps out on to the shore and the first thing that happens is a demon possessed man runs and worships him.

Now, before you get fearful that I’m about to do a discourse on the origin of demons, have no fear. There are two things I’ve always tried to steer clear from, dead people and demons. But I do know what bondage looks like. And I’m not sure in all of scripture if anyone was ever in need of freedom more desperately than this man at this moment.

We’re told that he spent all day and all night living in the tombs, walking in the mountains and as he walked around he would scream and beat and cut himself. How many different ways can you say tormented? But there is something so beautiful even in the midst of his torment. When Jesus got close, in spite of the demons who were wreaking havoc on his body and soul, something inside of him still realized the power that Jesus held and he didn’t walk to him, he didn’t run from him, he ran toward him and didn’t stop there. We’re then told that he fell on his knees and worshipped him.

How is that? How is it that someone can be so in bondage to their sin and so controlled by whatever vice of choice Satan has craftily snared them in and when Jesus gets near this man, who doesn’t have the wherewithal to get out from among the dead things, or to quit abusing his own body, can run to Jesus and fall at his feet and worship him?

I think the secret is found in Ecclesiastes 3:11 “God set eternity in the hearts of man.” What does that mean? Basically, God set us up. When he created us, He placed inside of us an eternity, God shaped hole, that only He could fill. And no matter what we've tried to fill it with, it would never be satisfied until it found the one who had actually created the void, knowing that only He could fill it.

There is a sermon in this passage that I can’t post here on this blog. But for this moment, this is the message. I’m not sure what torment might have a death grip on your soul. I’m not sure what dead things you might have made your home among. Maybe it’s the torment of your past, the pain of regret, or the vice of shame. Maybe it’s addiction or anger or adultery. But whatever it is we have to realize that God didn’t make His children to live among things that are dead and diseased and life killers. He created us to live among things that are living and life giving.

The other thing He needs us to know is that He is right here. He’s gotten out of the boat, stepped onto the soil of our hearts and is letting us know that He has freedom for us. He has the ability to truly set us free. Heal us in our deepest places and put us back in our right mind, in right relationship, in our rightful position.

You and I won’t get a lot of opportunities in this life worth running for. But if you are in desperate need of freedom, of healing, of wholeness, that my friend is a prime opportunity for running. Run to Him. Don’t walk. Don’t think about it. If you spend too much time doing that then the “accuser of the brethren”, the one who got you to this place of torment, will convince you that freedom isn’t available, or worse yet you’re not worthy of it. Trust me, freedom is always available and their isn't one of us around worthy of it!

Run today. Don’t walk. Don’t think. Don’t process. Just run. And when you do you will find that He is right there. Standing on shore. Right at the doorstep of your tomb…And He whom the Son has set free is free indeed.

One last thing, the most amazing thing to me about this passage of scripture is that not even the demons that lived inside of him, and they were numbered as legions, were capable of preventing him from running to Jesus. I think that makes the old saying true, "not a demon in hell will stop me." This is one man who wouldn't even let demons prevent him from being free.

Who Ran First?

2008-10-05T07:40:00.003-05:00

My mother has tons of old sayings. Like whenever the chicken fries up just perfect she will say, “Well, the moon must be just right in the sky.” And it could be the middle of the afternoon out there, but the moon is still somewhere and wherever it is it is just right. Whenever my nose itches she says, “Somebody’s coming to see you.” Or when your left hand itches she says, “You're going to get money.” And whenever the sky holds the perfect sunset that resembles a painting, She always says, “God must have painted that sky just for me.”

She has said that for years. So, now I can’t see a beautiful sunset without thinking of her and saying, “Yes, God must have painted that sky just for my mother.” And I kind of feel that way at sunrises. Like this one I just captured last week on Paradise Island from my own camera... I had a season of my life where I really enjoyed running, especially in that early part of the morning right between the final remnants of yesterday and first part of the new day. Watching the sun break through darkness is absolutely one of my favorite things. I called this “tilling time” in my Savannah series, where Savannah started her day out running and just having that dialogue with the Lord.

Well, I don’t run quite as much as I use to for a host of reasons. But every now and then, like last week, before the sun came up, I just wanted to run. Then Friday, I’m reading this passage in Proverbs 4:12 that has me thinking. “When you walk, your steps shall not be hampered-your path will be clear and open; and when you run you shall not stumble.” I wrote this down and then put two questions below it. When do I walk? When do I run? I sat there for a minute just staring at those two questions and asking myself. When do I run? When are the times in my life that I don't simply need to walk, but I need to run.
So, I began thinking about people in the Bible that at one time or another ran. The word walk is found often in the Bible-occurs 212 times in the Bible, while run only occurs 71 times. So, obviously walking is done far more often. But there are moments when people run. And that was what was tugging at me. When do I run? Because it doesn’t say “if” you run. But “when” you run. So, what are the times in my life where running isn’t just available but necessary?
The very first place my mind went was the scene in Luke 15 when the father of the prodigal son runs to meet him. This scene is a powerful scene and preached on so often. But it is usually used as an analogy of how God waits on us and our prodigal hearts to come home. And then I realized before I can run anywhere and accomplish anything, I have to first realize that He ran to me. Just like the father of the prodigal ran to meet His son. That’s exactly what God did with me. He ran after me.

But it was even more than that. Not only did He run after me, He was looking for me. Luke 15 says that even while the prodigal was way down the street his father saw him. Now I don’t know about you, but that has me picturing the father standing at the window. Looking. Waiting.

I use to sit at the window of my dad’s office in Greenwood, Indiana with my best friend Dawn McPherson watching and waiting and ‘hoping and praying’ for Donnie Osmond to come over the top of the hill past the corn field and to my door. Trust me, I would have seen him a mile away. After all I knew what he’d be wearing too, since I had my Donnie and Marie dolls and everything.
I have to believe that God has waited at the same window for you and me. Just hoping we would get close enough and when we did he would run to meet us. Desperate to wrap His arms around us. Tell us about the sleepless nights He’s spent waiting for our hearts to be willing to turn in the direction of home. (I know God never slumbers or sleep, but this is my way of relating this story...) Knowing that if we would just turn the corner and head back He would grab us and not let us go.

We’re going to talk this month about things worth running for. But before we can understand or appreciate or even be able to run towards something, we have to have a clear understanding of who ran first. The Creator of Heaven and Earth found you and I worth chasing. Worth looking for. Worth running after.

I love those scenes in cheesy romantic movies where the man and woman take two full hours to figure out they are destined to be together and then they take that final run towards one another. They end in a passionate embrace while the credits roll.

Well, this is far more than a cheesy movie. This is the story of our lives. And in order for any credits to roll, we first have to be willing to receive the love that has been chasing us, looking for us, waiting for us. When we do, then we can begin to fully realize all that is worth running towards ourselves.

May you turn towards home. I guarantee you’ll find He’s been looking for you...

Changing Names...

2008-09-30T03:48:00.000-05:00

I was having lunch with a young woman this weekend and as I listened to her share her heart I realized that she should meet a friend of mine. I told her I had a guy I wouldn’t mind introducing her to. Immediately she asked me, "What’s his name?" I knew instinctively why she wanted to know and couldn’t help but laugh. “Why, you want to see how it goes with yours?”

She just laughed in return. Because anyone that is a girl or knows a girl, knows that from the time we’re in grade school and have notebooks of our own to decorate we splatter them with the decoration of our new last name. My first one was Denise Gunnerson. Robbie Gunnerson was my third grade crush and the first boy that ever let me wear his baseball cap. That was only after I let go of my true first husband who had me going by the name of Denise Osmond.

A name change changes your very identity. It comes with a wedding ring, a “filing jointly” status and a life of being known as belonging to someone. And even though men will never know what it is to graffiti their Five Star notebooks with a new last name, I can’t help but think not one of us hasn’t at some point needed a name change.

God did a lot of changing names. He changed Abram to Abraham, Jacob to Israel, Simon to Peter and Saul to Paul. These men were childless, schemers, wishy-washy and bullies. But when God changed them the became fathers, patriarchs, rocks and history changers.

What is most heartbreaking is when someone doesn’t believe their name can be changed. I see it so often. People who have decided their sin, their “just the way I am,” or the pain of their past is who they are. Some may fight for a while. Tug at the chains around their neck, Try to pretend they’re something they’re not. But the bloodiness of their hands has them tired. And the charade that might have fooled others has never fooled them.

But the chain has a key to the lock. The “sin that doeth so easily beset us,” has a liberator. The schemer, the abuser, the double-minded man, the adulterer, the liar, the alcoholic, the doubter, each has a redeemer, who when He sets us free He “sets us free indeed.” Not halfway. Not partway. But all the way.

Will it hurt? Yep. It will change us forever. Because it won’t just change our name it will change the way we walk too. When Jacob met the Angel of God at the ford of the Jabbok and they wrestled, scripture says that the Angel touched Jacob in his hip socket and he forever walked with a limp. Even how he walked was different. Why? Because he looked in the face of that Angel and said, “I’m not letting go until you bless me.”

Why do people spend their lives with names they were never meant to carry, pains God never desired them to endure, identities defined by their issues instead of who God can be to them? Because they weren’t willing to hold on. They weren’t willing to “go there” to “get there.” Jacob knew what the old Jacob looked like. The old Jacob had spent his life running. Stealing. And living with the consequences of it. And he was bloody alright, but when he finally got to a place, away from his family, away from all his crutches, and alone with God, God met him. And wrestled with Him and He with God. And no matter how difficult the struggle Jacob refused to let go. And in the end God changed his name. He changed his name to Israel. He was now known as the man who "persisted with God." And Jacob was never the same. Never.

I don’t know how you may have thought you were defined. I don’t know what you’ve been called in the past, how you’ve named yourself, what your parents called you, or what your friends addressed you by. But I know that each of us has the opportunity to be redefined. Don’t have to take it. Everything with God is a choice. He created choice. Why? Because He, like us, wants His name to be chosen. Just like we as women choose whose name we will take in marriage because we want to know we love them and just like men choose who they will give their name to, because they want it to belong to the one they want to spend the rest of their lives with, God is the same way. He wants to be desired, cherished and when He is, He graciously bestows His name upon us. And when He does even the way we walk will be different.

May we be so bold as to cross over to the Jabbock. May we get alone with God and may we persist with him until He blesses us. May we not let go until He blesses us. Because the one thing I do know is that He won’t ever let go of us…

He Knows me by Name

2008-09-21T15:22:00.005-05:00

I was doing my usual Sunday morning routine, roast in the oven, homemade biscuits made and ready to bake when I got home. (I know...southern girl making homemade biscuits...crazy.) Headed to the bathroom to start getting ready for church and standing there in front of my makeup mirror, magnified more times than should be legal, my ears tuned into the news coming from the television in my bedroom.

They were recapping the financial crisis of this past week. They proceeded to speculate on what would happen if this 700 billion dollar bailout wasn't enough. That was when my mind started. First the thought, then the vain imagination, by the time I was through I was envisioning my entire family all living back at my parent's house rationing peas and corn. Honestly, that was where my mind went.

Immediately I brought that thought into captive. Standing there in front of the mirror, mascara wand in hand, I shook it at my reflection and simply stated, "God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, of love and of a sound mind." I didn't stop there, "I've never seen the righteous forsaken, or God's seed begging for bread." I steadied the beating of my erratic heart beat and continued to get ready and headed out to church. As I slipped into my padded chair next to my friend these words came on the screen...

Who has told every lightning bolt where it should go
Or seen heavenly storehouses laden with snow
Who imagined the sun and gives source to its light
Yet conceals it to bring us the coolness of night
None can fathom

Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God
All powerful, untamable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God

The tears fell freely. No big surprise. I'm an emotional sort that way. But I realized that is my God. That is our God. The God who tells lightening where to strike, who gives the sun the source for its light, who placed the stars in the sky and knows them by name. That same God who knew us before we were formed in our mother's womb. That is our God.

God doesn't determine our life on the fly. He didn't wake up this morning and play "tiddly winks" with our destinies. He knew each day before we were even a thought to our mother and father. Before sperm met egg. Before desire met opportunity. Before all of that God created a destiny for us.

Are there uncertainties in life? Absolutely. Are some of us facing more difficult times than we ever have before? I wouldn't doubt it. But does any of that change the faithfulness or ability of God? Not for a moment.

My pastor shared this thought in Sunday's service, "trials and difficulties are often the place where vision begins." Maybe in the seasons of our most difficult places God will create new vision in us. Financial Adviser Dave Ramsey found his gift only after going bankrupt. Now he's oneof the nation's leading financial advisors, has a show on Fox Business Channel and the 4th rated radio show in the nation. Maybe during the difficult season of our life God has a new vision to place into the very soul of us. But we have to be willing to look at the Creator of our life instead of the circumstance of our day.

Whatever times may be ahead, whether prosperous or challenging, none of it changes the fact that the God knows us by name. The picture at the top of the page is of a Stock Broker on Wall Street bowed in defeat. Ironic that it is this same position that brings real victory. Don't know what you might be bowing down to. Not sure if you've bowed your head in prayer for a while. Not sure if you've ever bowed your heart to the One who formed you, but He is waiting. Available. Even now. And I do know that if He has heavenly storehouses laden with snow and is waiting for the perfect time to let them fall, then He can be trusted with whatever place the state of your heart finds itself today.

This picture however is the vision of the God who knows you...The one who is behind that sun and tells that water where it must stop. That is our God. And He is amazing...And He knows us by name...

Don't Grow Weary

2008-09-14T07:57:00.002-05:00

I keep hoping. Each season. Each time the first game of the year rolls around. Each time I get out my USC glass stemware, put on my Carolina t-shirt and pull out my boiled peanuts and coca-cola, I think "Surely this will be the year." We even won our first game 32-0. That win ranked us at 24. Even though we looked like the Keystone Cops the entire game. So, when I got into my seat at the Vanderbilt Stadium, Thursday night a week ago, I knew this would be our year. Vanderbilt had always been our "For Sure" win of the year. Not so much last year. Not so much this year either. My best college buddy, Beth Davis, even came up from Charleston to spend the weekend with me and go to the game. We didn't miss hardly any of them when we went to Carolina, and it was like old times. Completely like old times. We lost again.

Yesterday as I watched us throw an interception at the five yard line during the last twenty seconds of our game against Georgia, to rake in our second loss, I realized once again this was going to be a very weary season.

Kind of like some of the things in our life. We have those moments where it seems like we win a victory and it's going to set a new tone for our lives. Only to be met the next week with a moment of defeat in the very area we thought we had victory. And we grow weary. Weary in the well doing.

And I realize that life is often lost in the middle of the season. Real victories are often given up on before the goal line is even in site. We give up because we're afraid. We give up because we're tired. We give up because we meet resistance. We give up because it feels too difficult, too unattainable.

But our life has a "race marked out for us." And the only way to run this race is with "perseverance." It is this perseverance that produces character. I've learned in this life that the places where true character has been performed in me is the very place where perseverance was my constant companion.

I'm having to practice this even now. Back about five years ago, while in Savannah, Georgia I got a vision in my heart of something I felt the Lord had called me to do. At that time all I had was the "what." Five years later, this past May, while in the little tree house in Dadeville, Alabama of my friend Nellie Jo, during a moment when I was learning how to "be" instead of "do", I got the "how" to the "what". (Hope you could follow all of that...) And since then I have been putting into place the pieces necessary to accomplish this new vision. And each day I fight the feelings of inadequacies, the moments I feel completely overwhelmed. Fortunately, that is the place where we know that it is not about us. It is about what God is capable of doing through us.

Many dreams, visions, marriages, even lives are lost in the mid-season. They're lost when we've had a few setbacks, discover our inadequacies and take our eyes off the quarterback. We forget we're a part of a team, or could be, and we try to do it ourselves. It is here many dreams are lost, aborted even. Simply abandoned because of our fear, our shame or our disillusionment.

May I encourage you today with this, it doesn't matter if you're down 1-7 in the season. Each game offers a new opportunity for victory. Just like each day offers a new mercy. If yesterday didn't work out so well, if you gave up, gave in, today is a new day with new mercies, and the same promise. That the man who doesn't "grow weary in well doing, in due season will reap if he faints not."

You and I have a game to play. A victory to win. A vision to accomplish. A faithful companion for the journey. There will be moments we'll get sacked, tackled so hard the stars fly, but there will be a moment when we'll cross into the end zone, watch the ball fly through the goal posts, and hear the roar of the crowd. And none of that will be experienced if we give up now.

May you brush the dirt of your white stretchy pants, pull the patch of grass out of your helmet, and pat your team mate on the butt and get your booty back there on the field. We've got a game to win, you've got a marriage to save, you've got a vision to accomplish, you've got a child to raise, a neighbor to touch and none of that will get done if you park your self on the metal bench that runs up the sidelines.

I will say this about my Gamecocks, yes they are still my Gamecocks despite my brother's ridicule, even with 30 seconds left on the clock they were still fighting for victory. The game may not have turned out the way they had hoped, even fought for it to turn out, but the beauty is they were still fighting when the clock ran out. There may be some things in life that don't turn out like we hope or even the way our efforts strive for, but what I can promise you is that when the game is over and the coach knows you've given it your best effort, He's going to wrap His arms around us and let us know that there is much coming our way, much to reap in this journey of life for the perseverance we've shown. And next week is a whole new game!

We play Wofford! If we can't win that...well...then we're...oh, yeah, right, this is about perseverance. Okay then, there's always next week...

Every Resource Needed

2008-09-09T09:31:00.001-05:00

Sorry for the late blog. It was a long day and a late night. But it was actually the events of last night that prompted me to change my blog. A sweet friend of mine invited me to attend an opening house at Maplewood High School in Nashville last night. She is part of an organization called Operation Andrew and they were feeding all the attendees of the open house last night, so we fixed up teacher gifts bags and served up some mean Nashville Barbecue.

As we sat in their beautiful auditorium and listened to their principle, Dr. Julie Williams, she showed statistics of the dramatic change in their student body in the last year. She was called out of retirement to pull this school out of the hole. In 2006 they were the lowest performing school in all of Davidson County. Their gang rate was at 70%. Their graduation rate at 41%. And turn it around she did. Last year's open house had 8 people. Yes, you got that right, 8 people. This year's open house had at least 200. All that in the span of a year.

I was also struck by a young teacher and the ROTC director, who began to talk about the "No Child Left Behind" benefits. Every student in that school has the ability for $1355.00 worth of free tutoring. She kept repeating that over and over. As if some of them might not actually take advantage of that. It was that repeated statement that was still running through my head as I drove home.

Staring at the headlight splattered back roads of Franklin, I wondered, "Would someone actually not take advantage of $1355.00 worth of free tutoring? Is it possible that children could have such resources and never realize what was at their fingertips?"

That was when the realization struck me. "How much do you have at your fingertips that you don't tape into? You have the Creator of the Universe who has made the same power that raised Christ from the dead dwelling inside of you. How often do you tap into that?" And I thought of all the wasted opportunities. Wasted moments of prayer, wasted moments of fellowship, wasted moments of meeting someone else's need. And all the power that is mine, all of the resources of God's grace, God's forgiveness, God's deliverance, God's mercy, that is never utilized.

I remember last year having a shouting match with God. Well, let me rephrase, I was shouting, He was considerably kind and gentle. I shouted to the roof of my red Ford rental, "Why did you let this happen? Why is this their struggle? It all seems so unfair. Why won't you set them free?! Why won't you make all of this go away! Why won't you...!" You can feel in the blank. You've probably had a few of those yourself too, I'm sure.

And what I heard was so kind and gentle. He said, "Baby girl," Can't help it, that's what He calls me. "Baby girl, I didn't cause this. This is a result of a fallen world. But what I do for each of my children is I give them every resource needed for their victory. And I gave this child extraordinary gifts, a wonderful family that would walk with them anywhere, and endless opportunities. I gave them every resource needed for their victory. If they live without it, it isn't because I haven't provided the resources for it."

The same was true last night. A young girl did a dramatic presentation called, "You don't live on my street." And you know what she was right. I don't live on her street. I don't know what it is to come to school hungry. The automotive teacher shared with me that she, yes, the automotive teacher is a she, that she couldn't understand why the children weren't attentive. And she said she finally asked them and they said, "We're hungry." So, she said, "I may not be able to change the situations in their families, but I can make sure these babies are fed, and let them know they can change their generation. They don't have to be like their mama and daddy."

I don't know what it's like to walk by an empty refrigerator, a seducing "uncle", or live with the fear of gang members. And if I could rescue each one of them I would. Yet, once again I saw resources for victory. Amazingly gifted and wonderful teachers. Financial support and assistance for a substantial education. A gifted and inspirational Principle who knows each child in that schools test scores and name. Every resource needed...

I don't know what you may be struggling with today. I don't know what you might be shouting at the roof of your car about this afternoon. But what I do know is that every resource needed in this life, for our victory, has been made available to us. The decision to be "left behind" in the muck and mire of our stuff will be ours alone. It won't be because a merciful and loving God hasn't thought about us in advance. May we let nothing afforded us be wasted...

When Walls Fall

2008-09-02T05:59:00.000-05:00

On June 12, 1987, President Ronald Reagan spoke to Mikhail Gorbachev. The only thing was Mr. Gorbachev wasn't exactly there. But he didn't miss the words spoken to him from the President of the free world as President Reagan stood in front of the Berlin Wall. One of my favorite books is When Character was King:A Story of Ronald Reagan by Peggy Noonan. She records these words from that momentous day:

"We welcome change and open-ness, for we believe that freedom and security go together, that the advance of human liberty can only strengthen the cause of world peace. This is one sign the Soviets can make that would be unmistakable, that would advance dramatically the cause of freedom and peace.
General Secretary Gorbachev, if you seek peace, if you seek prosperity for the Soviet Union and Eastern Europe, if you seek liberalization: Come here to this gate! Mr. Gorbachev, open this gate! Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!"

I've always loved this moment. Even had outlandish Amber quote it in my book Savannah from Savannah. But I never dreamed that one day I'd see it, touch it and have a piece of it. But last Monday I did. And my dad snapped this picture. I didn't know he had taken it, but I did know that as powerful as the wall that was in front of me, were the figurative walls that still stand all around us. Some are in our hearts. Some still reside in our culture. But each one still divides those things that were meant to be united.

As I've watched this election season, no matter what your political leaning, we shouldn't miss the power of the walls that are coming down. It wasn't until I was in the fourth grade that I went to school with African American children. By middle school two of my closest friends were black. One was Corliss Green. Though she demanded I call her "Collard Green". We all got a kick out of that. Walls that I didn't even know I had, began to come down and deep relationships were developed. Yet, I've been amazed at the racial divide that still exists in this nation. So, to watch Barak Obama rise to the opportunity that he has, if it hasn't destroyed this wall of division, it has at least done severe damage.

Then we watched as a woman was nominated for the vice presidency. Granted you couldn't pay me to take the job, but we have watched once again as walls are beginning to fall. Yet chasms still exist.

Yet, for most of us it isn't the global walls we're as concerned about because we have our own personal walls to deal with. Many of them reside under our own roof. They are walls built up in the middle of our beds separating husband and wife. Or drawn down the center of the dining room table. Maybe they are walls built between us and a friend, an extended family member, a co-worker.

Or maybe our walls are internal. Our walls of self-doubt. Our walls of pride. Our walls of self-protection. Whatever they are, the words are still true. They need to come down. Why? Because of the damage they do. They divide. They separate. They remove the ability of true perspective. The remove the joy of truly living.

In Reagan's famous Evil Empire speech that he made at the National Association of Evangelicals on March 8, 1983, he closed with this statement:
"While America's military strength is important, let me add here that I've always maintained that the struggle now going on for the world will never be decided by bombs or rockets, by armies or military might. The real crisis we face today is a spiritual one; at root, it is a test of moral will and faith."

Pretty much the same for us. The global wars we face won't be truly defeated by bombs or rockets, or even by our precious men and women in uniform. (May God keep them safe.) Even though wars are often noble and necessary. And global wars won't be won by one political party or another either. Politics nor politicians can save us from the real enemy. Because the enemy that leads us even into natural wars has at its source a spiritual root. Every war we've ever been a part of always has.

And the wars of our life and the walls we've built won't come down with simply more war either. With the war of our words. Or our cold shoulder. Or our unreturned phone calls. They won't be decided by who can hold out the longest or who can make their point the loudest.

The walls of life, both global and personal will never fall until there is a crisis of faith. Until we realize that the real crisis is spiritual. That's why God tore down his wall when Jesus died. And when that veil was rent, and that wall came down, "mercy came running" in our direction. And the grace we need to tear down the walls of our heart was made available. And when the hardness of our heart is melted by truth and our walls fall, real healing can begin.

I'm not sure what gave Ronald Reagan the desire to see that wall come down that day. Maybe he knew what walls were like and he didn't want anyone else to have to live with one. That's usually how it happens. We speak from what we know. But all I know is he did. And it did.

I've been chiseling away at my walls for a while now. Somedays I see more progress than others. Somedays my arms are tired. But I know there's something on the other side worth having. And I also know that I don't want anything obstructing my view...if you'd like to borrow my jackhammer when I'm through I'll be glad to loan it to you. I don't know if you have to sharpen jackhammer's or not. But if you do, it will probably need it.

What the Olympics Taught Me

2008-08-26T05:49:00.000-05:00

I've loved watching the Olympics ever since I was a little girl. When Pat Lafontaine led the ice hockey "dream team" to Gold all those years ago, I couldn't get my eyes off the television set. Yes, I was still a babe...dare you ask. Or the year that the men's gymnastics team with Bart Conner and Tim Daggett one gold when no one thought they would. Magical. The Olympics also brought us Dorothy Hammill and my dream of being her successor. That however didn't work out too well. First time my feet hit the ice my booty got bruised. Then they brought us Mary Lou Rhetton and my next dream of being her successor too. That didn't work out to well either. Won't even tell you about my first attempt on the vault. Let's just say, I didn't know a body could propel itself so far. Thank God even the walls were padded. But the Olympics have taught me amazing things.

This year it taught me that the old gray mare ain't what she use to be. This revelation came as I was watching the women's gymnastic. I was sitting there and the inane thought came to me, "I bet I can still do that." So, I got myself down on the floor and tried my hand at a back bend. Bent my back alright! Right out of socket. With that I gave up all thoughts of ever achieving Olympic Gold. I also gave up working out for the rest of the week seeing as walking wasn't even working out too well.

But they taught me other things as well. They taught me what the power of disciplining a life and eating three fried egg sandwiches and a pound of pancakes a morning can get you. They can make you Michael Phelps. They taught me that records are made to be broken and someone who does it better will always come up after us. But we should delight in that. It doesn't negate what we did, it just simply celebrates the achievements of another. i.e., Mark Spitz.

I learned we can pass our gifts down to our children. i.e., the young girl who won the Olympic Gold in gymnastics, twenty years to the day that her father lost it by five tenths of a point. I learned that swimmers are part fish and that a forty one year old woman can still run with the youngins', i.e. Dara Torres. I also learned that volley ball people get a lot of sand in their shorts and that Greco-Roman Wrestling is a sport! I learned women can wield powerful swords too. i.e, the first gold medal won by American was won by a woman with a sword! I learned that the men's water polo team and divers need some more material on their swimsuits! And I learned that God's creatures can run like gazelles.

I'm sure if I was more astute I could have learned a whole lot more. But I did leave with one powerful revelation. I was informed that I, yes me, and possibly you too, have been responsible for making every Olympic dream come true for the last eighty years. Betcha didn't know that did you? But yes, I have. How you ask? Because Coca-Cola told me that if I had bought a Coke in the last eighty years that I had. So, here's to my achievements. And here's to yours! And here's to the gold medal I could receive if they ever made drinking coke an Olympic Sport! And here is mine and Sophie's tribute...and I may not have a gold medal around my neck, but I sure have a lot of priceless treasures in my life...

Our Story-Delighted

2008-08-15T05:14:00.007-05:00

Befriended, befriended by the King above all Kings
Surrendered, surrendered to a friend above all friends
Invited, invited deep into this mystery
Delighted, delighted by the wonders I have seen

My brother just threw a surprise party for my sister-in-law. The poor guy was so petrified something was going to go wrong that I think we received about ten e-vites. (I'm still amazed he knew how to do an e-vite.) But it was all for that moment when she would turn the corner, a group of her closest friends would yell surprise and that look would be captured on her face. He wanted to see that look. That look of sheer delight.

I believe God does that as well. I believe there are things he does for no other reason than to delight us. In the twenty first chapter of John Jesus' disciples are out fishing. Jesus as already risen from the dead, He's visited them on two other occasions, but this particular morning he shows up on the seashore. They fished all night and caught nothing. He hollers out to them, "Caught anything."
"Nope."
"Why don't you try throwing your net on the other side of the boat."
They give it a whirl. And the catch is ginormous! Too much to even get all those flapping creatures in the boat.
And immediately John says, "It's the Lord."
And Jesus gets to enjoy the delight on there face.

I might think it was about the food if when they make it to shore Jesus didn't already have dinner on the grill. But He does. So, it can't be about the food. So, couldn't it be that He just wanted to enjoy delighting His children? I think it could.

About a year ago I was given the opportunity to audition for a commercial. A friend has a modeling and talent agency and needed some models in my "age bracket". We know what that means don't we...I laughed and said, "Sure, you call me when you are in dire straights." Well, she did. And I went. Here I was with my midget self, "dressed the part", of a housewife who is supposed to be painting a room. I've got on a tennis shoes, jeans and a sweatshirt. And every other girl sitting around me is leggy and lean and looks like a supermodel. If there had been a hole to crawl into the only thing sticking out of it would have been my booty...

So, I audition and have to admit caught an element of delight in the eyes of the lady that shot it, but still wasn't thinking Academy Award. Got in the car and had a good old laugh with my mom on the way home. Weeks past and I had laid my starry eyed delusions of fame down when I got a call. They wanted me. Quit laughing! They did. But they wanted me for a date I couldn't do it. It was a trip I couldn't reschedule and one I had told them about on the day of my audition. I just said sorry. A week later, they had changed the shoot date and hired me. I was driving home, just giddy. Laughing and "processing" and the Lord broke through my head and said, "You may forget things, but I never forget."

When I was a little girl I had done musical theater all throughout school. Loved it. Thought I'd make a great lead on a soap opera, but didn't quite know how to get to Hollywood. Gave it all up for reality and ended up creating my own form of drama on the written page. I had forgotten how much I had loved it. He hadn't.

I've asked myself why there are moments in my life that I miss Him when He comes to delight. I could have enjoyed that moment but never given Him the opportunity to break through and see that it was Him. That He had moved the world to delight me. Okay, maybe just a shoot date, but to me it may as well have been the world.

I think there are a few reasons moments like that are missed. One is despair. When Job was in his deepest sorrow He said, "I look for him in the east but he isn't there. And to the west but I can't perceive him." Sometimes our crisis moments turn our eyes so inward that we're not looking for where He might be moving, we're only looking for where it doesn't seem He is. And we get so focused on the "us" of that moment we miss the Him.

But I bet if you think back there were moments when you could see Him. When He felt exceptionally near. In the car maybe, when you'd turn on the praise and worship music. In the first moments of morning before it was over run by children and demands. In the evening out on the back porch, when the world had finally shut down to breathe. Maybe if you go back there, you will have your spirit renewed and your eyes be able to focus on something other than the crisis that has surrounded. I think the disciples went back to fishing because that's where the met Jesus the first time. And they wanted to be as close to that as they possibly could.

For others I think sin removes our ability to see. We're told in Corinthians that "repentance removes the veil." Sin in our lives keeps us blind. We're focused on fulfilling our wants, our whims, our wishes. We're focused on satisfying that endless thirst in the depths of our soul and leaving no room for the Creator of it. And so our heart can't see. But when we repent, we turn, we see.

I challenge you today to take God to the secret places. To the places of hidden imaginations. I know we think we hide them from Him. But He sees even what we try to hide. And in ridding ourselves of secret worlds, God will deliver hidden treasures of delight.

Regret can be a delight killer too. See, the disciple John is the one who recognized Jesus. And he turns and tells Peter. Peter had just recently denied Jesus three times and was devastated over the capability of his own betrayal. And right after Jesus reveals himself there on the seashore he looks at Peter and deals with his regret.

If Peter would have stayed in that pit of regret than his story would have been void of the chapter where he was the father of the Christian church. Can you imagine having that cut from your story? But he was. Why? Because once and for all he let go of the regret. Regret will give us nothing but sorrow. And when God forgives, He forgives completely. Our choice to hold on to regret will simply remove His ability to use us in the future, and important chapters of our story will be divinely altered. What a tragedy, to live with something God is so willing to remove.

But what creates an avenue for delight? Relationship. Bringing God into those intimate places of our life. Befriending Him. Surrendering to Him. Inviting Him. We each have a story. A powerful epic. For some of us we have battles to fight. For others you have beauties to rescue. And for others we have laughter to deliver. But we have a story. And in the middle of all of the pages God simply wants to delight us. Hard to believe in a crazy world with wars and famine and poverty that He really would care if His children are surprised, but He does. That's why He tugs on the hearts of some individuals to bring orphanage relief, so that His children with no earthly father can receive the delight of their heavenly father when they hold a new ball or play with a new doll.

He cares about their delight and He cares about ours. May we let Him write our story. And may we recognize and then enjoy the moments that He stops the pages to delight us...

Comment to Anonymous

2008-08-15T05:06:00.001-05:00

My precious friend,

The beautiful thing about God is that His love invites each of us. Your invitation comes as beautifully packaged and as elegantly embossed as mine. But the stories of our lives will be different. Your road and my road will not look alike. Your pains and trials will not look like mine. Nor your amazing discoveries. Why? Because what He desires to accomplish through us and with us is not the same. What is the same is the invitation. Coming from the same Father, extended with the same grace. My sweet friend, I think the one thing that makes me love the Lord all the more is the fact that He can call a mother Teresa and still call an "over processing", often dramatic, needy soul like myself. The distance is not between you and I. The distance is between us and Him. That's why He span the chasm. May He reveal His great love to you, and may anything in your heart that clouds it be laid to rest...

But the only thing you or I need to know, separate of all I've just said, is that if it had only been you or only been me He would have still died. Thus proving that each of us is loved in the same extravagant way.

Invited Over a Stack of Dirty Dishes...

2008-08-13T17:37:00.000-05:00

So my company leaves Monday night and I'm standing over the sink staring at the dirty dishes. My mind is spinning, my addiction to "over processing" has begun and the tears begin to fall on the William Sonoma tan and cream striped dish towel in my hand. They came to support me and implementing a new vision that I feel like the Lord has given me. They were kind enough to take an evening away from their families and help me. They had so many wonderful ideas and so much information and I was mildly, okay, ginormously overwhelmed...(I know that is so not a word, but it completely fits.)

As I'm gathering my emotions I hear that sweet voice of my Father and Friend. "He says I can walk through this with you." And I realized that moment He was inviting me to invite Him into this moment in my life. I've spent the last year learning how to retrain myself. For years whenever something exciting or overwhelming occurred I made one phone call immediately. That person is no longer available. So, this year I have been learning that even though my first reaction is to call my mother or my best friend, but I feel that tug, "invite me." So I have. I've invited Him to my most vulnerable places. And what I've found is He has been trustworthy with them. That's why when He gave the invitation Monday night I did.

There over caked on pot roast, small plates covered in left over syrup we had dipped our homemade biscuits in, (Yes I make homemade biscuits. I love Carole Faye, but she ain't got nothing on me!), I invited Him. Wish I would have thought about it before He asked. Maybe that will come. Who knows. I'm just grateful He still invites. I pray when He invites you to invite Him this week, whether in the car, washing the dishes, wiping up sticky hand prints off of glass paned windows, that you'll say, "Come right on." I can tell you from experience, it made cleaning those dishes a lot more enjoyable...

Best,
Denise

Our Story-Invited

2008-08-12T06:18:00.001-05:00

(Me and Miss Carole Faye, the Biscuit Lady at Loveless Cafe. She invited me to eat some of her biscuits. I gladly accepted. Some invitations only have to be made once.)

Befriended, befriended by the King above all kings Surrendered, surrendered to the friend above all friends Invited, invited deep into this mystery

Imagine that you stick your hand into the abyss of your black mailbox. You’re expecting ten magazines from companies you’ve never heard of, at least five bills from companies you wish had never heard of you, but you’re not expecting this. An invitation. You thought graduations were over and everyone you knew that was getting married had already gotten married. But you now hold in your hand a thick cream envelope, with your name written in calligraphy and you know it’s an invitation. You groan slightly (You know you do…) because most invitations require something of you. Usually something that costs.

You open it, mostly because you just don’t have a clue who it from. It simply reads, “You’re invited to a journey.” No destination announced. Only promises “extreme adventure.” The catch, well, it does have a cost all right. “Everything.”
Would you go? Better yet, would you go if you had no idea who the sender was? But what if the invitation came from your father? Your best friend? Would that make a difference? Or would the fact that the journey is a mystery be enough to check “No” in the RSVP box?

Abraham got an invitation like this. An invitation by the Creator of the Universe to go to a land that he would have to trust God to discover. But if he was willing to go, not only was God going to make a great nation out of him, but God was also going to bless him and make him famous. (You want to go now don’t you!) He was also going to bless everyone who blessed him and curse everyone who cursed him.

Would that be enough for you and I? Would an invitation into something wonderful and exciting, yet unknown and expensive, be worth the risk? Well, it was enough for Abraham, because as soon as God delivers the invitation, Abraham did what we’ve learned he usually does. Scripture says simply this, “Abraham departed.”

Again, there is no dialogue. No, “I’m not going anywhere unless you tell me where we’re going. I’m not leaving here without a ten-step program for my life. I’m not moving here until we have the next five years clearly defined. I’m not taking a step until you let me know where we’re going to end up.”

And I wonder, as I did last week, what would have happened if there had been this exchange of dialogue? What would have been missed if Abraham hadn’t simply departed?

Don’t know if you realize it, but we have been invited. The Man who invented the party has invited us to the party. Yet there is one thing that remains unknown. We have no idea where that invitation will take us. When He invited His disciples all he said was “Come follow me…and I will make you fishers of men.” And every time with each invitation we’re told, “At once they left their nets and became His disciples-sided with His party and followed Him.” (Told you He invented the party!)

If you ever wondered if you were invited, you were. Before the foundations of the world, before your mother knew your sex, before you made your entrance, produced your first cry, drew your first breath, you were invited. The challenge for so many is that it is a mystery.

We have no idea what lies ahead. We have no idea what the journey will unfold. We don’t know if sacrifice will be required. We don’t know if years of waiting will be demanded. We don’t know if pain will be endured. We don’t know…and for a generation who has to be in the “know”, or think we’re in control, this is a huge sacrifice.

But the one thing I do know is that in going, Abraham became a friend of God. It was in that one step of faith that set the course for the Abraham moment we talked about two weeks ago, where God takes him into His secret counsel.

Can you imagine if the invitation in our mailbox had been from the White House? And this is your dream so you can pick the President that resides there. Just know, it’s a President you voted for and he wants you there for a special dinner. No one else. Just you and him and he wants to talk with you about your story and the plans he has to help you live it out to the fullest. Would you go? Honey, I wouldn’t just be going, I’d be going with a new dress, my nails done, my hair coiffed, my heart palpitating, my palms sweating and my expectations soaring.

Well, an invitation from one greater has come. And He invites us into this mystery of our story. And even though when I began this journey with the Lord my future was a mystery and I had no idea of the joys, the pains, the challenges, the waiting that I would endure, I also never knew the depths in which He would allow me to know Him. And truth is, there is much in this life I’m glad I didn’t know. Or, if in the knowing, I would have more than likely never made the journey. And that would have been far more tragic than my moments of tragedy.

And please know this is an invitation that costs everything. We he called the disciples for many that invitation costs them their very lives. (Another reason God wisely keeps our stories a mystery.) But I also know that He gives life more abundantly.

We also need to know we won’t be invited just once. There will be many times in the course of our stories that God will invite us to a new place, a new level, a new opportunity. Will we go? Or will fear keep us from the adventure? When God invited me to a new chapter in my story last year I went. Now, I must say I didn’t go quite as non-confrontational as Abraham. I think I bucked some, hollered some, cried some, and kept my hand over my eyes for the first couple months. But one day God invited me again, “Hey baby girl, why don’t you take your hands off of your eyes and see what I’ve got planned for you.” And I did. And I’m not even capable of writing the beauty that I’ve seen. Worth the cost? Absolutely. Paid a high price? Higher than one I would have ever wanted to. Glorious adventure? Life changing. May the mysteries of our stories continue…

Our Story-Surrendered

2008-08-05T00:00:00.002-05:00

Befriended, befriended by the King above all kings
Surrendered, surrendered to the friend above all friends...

Ooh, surrender. Doesn't even sound pleasant does it? Immediately pictures of white flags sticking out of windows or fox holes come to mind. Surrender goes hand in hand with "losing battles," and "falling into the hands of the enemy." But there is a different type of surrender. The friend kind. "Faithful are the wounds of a friend," the writer of Proverbs tells us. So, if we're becoming friends, "know you by your walk" kind of friends with the Creator of the Universe, then we're talking about a completely different kind of surrender. We're talking about a surrender that could change the very essence of how our story is written.

I can't think of anyone who was asked to surrender more than Abraham. Even though the Bible is full of people who lost their children, Adam, David, Job, Ruth, Mary, only one person in the Bible was asked to sacrifice their child in an act of obedience the way Abraham was.

Now, before Abraham ever had his son Isaac, God came to him and told him that he would have a son and he was to call him Isaac (Laughter). Can't think of anything funnier or horrible than being a hundred and having a baby! So the name seems perfect. But Abraham was told that it would be through this child that Abraham would become the father of many nations.

So, after Abraham and Jesus' talked about saving at least 10 righteous, Abraham and Sarah find themselves having this son God has promised. And laugh they did! And everybody else did too! As Isaac grows older we're told that God came to "prove" Abraham. He calls Abraham by name. And immediately Abraham acknowledges the call. "Here I am". I love that. Immediately, He answers. That's because he knows the voice of his friend so well... But this is a request that you wouldn't think would come from a friend. God tells him to take his son, the one he loves so much and offer him up as a burnt offering upon one of the mountains that the Lord would direct him too.

What is most powerful about this passage of scripture to me is what isn't there. Because the very next verse says, "So Abraham rose early in the morning..." What? No screaming? No shouting match to the heavens? No flayling fists and midnight bargains? Just getting up and going along as if its just another day? But that's what we read. Nowhere do we read that Abraham debated the issue of complete surrender to His Father.

Theologians will probably debate the reason for centuries. And since I'm no theologian I won't even try. I'll just give my thoughts as simple as they may be. Maybe, just maybe, there was such a depth of friendship, such a deep level of trust, in his Heavenly father, that Abraham knows somehow, someway God is going to make all of this work out. After all, God Himself had already told Abraham that it was going to be through this boy that he was going to be the father of a great nation. So, God would either stop him, or raise Isaac from the dead. But he knew God would accomplish what He said.

Surrender? Is there any greater act of it recorded in the Bible? Any clearer example of it revealed in the Word of God? And Romans tells us that "Abraham believed (trusted in) God, and it was credited to his account as righteouness." Abraham was saved through his trust in God.

Shoot, I don't know about you but some days I have trouble trusting Him to work out simple situations, lead me in my next step, provide for my next need, let alone trusting Him should He ask me to surrender something as precious as a child. So, how does Abraham get there? Relationship. God already proved His word by giving Isaac to Abraham. The first covenant God ever made was with Abraham. He brought Abraham into his secret place when they talked about the righteous people left in Sodom. Daily walking with God built a trust, a confidence, a faith in God so great that when he asked of Abraham the ultimate sacrifice, Abraham simply began walking. That too is how we get there. Relationship. Daily walking this life out with God. And through that we learn that there is nothing that He will ask of us that He won't give us the ability to do, and the resources to accomplish.

There was a sacrifice made that day, but it wasn't Isaac. No, God stayed Abraham's hand. But there was a ram that was caught in the thicket that became the sacrifice. Do you know what I've always envisioned? I've always imagined that as Abraham was walking up one side of that mountain in an act of complete surrender to His Father and Friend, God was walking up the other side of that mountain leading that ram. And if Abraham hadn't gone all the way to the top, he would have never gotten to the ram.

I'm not sure what you might be asked to surrender today. A dream maybe, your will, your illusion of control. Maybe your being asked to trust God with your child or your marriage or your finances. And holding on as tightly as you can seems far more appealing. Safe even. But are we really? Is what we hold really safer in our hands then in the hands of our Faithful Father? Or is my unwillingness to surrender causing me to miss the ram in my thicket? God won't leave us with wasted sacrifices. God honors obedient hearts. And he never asks anything of us that He doesn't give us even more in return.

Surrender changed the story. If Abraham had not walked up that mountain, but had held onto Isaac, this powerful story would have never been written. And you and I would never have this example of the faithfulness of God. Will our unwillingness to completely surrender all that we are, all that we have, to the Creator of our Souls cause someone to miss the powerful display of His love in our story? I'm guessing the answer is yes. Don't know about you, but I don't want anyone to miss how God shows up in mine...

Befriended

2008-08-03T07:12:00.000-05:00

Sure have enjoyed being befriended this week. I was walking the other morning listening to Israel Houghton's song, "I am a Friend of God". Just reminded me of what a privilege that really is.

Then I was having lunch with a friend on Thursday and she was talking about the "befriended" blog and why Abraham stopped at 10 people. I told her about something I had heard one of my pastors say one time, "I'm not sure if Abraham stopped at 10 because he was afraid to go any farther, or if he knew that was as far as God would go."

I'm thinking his friendship had him able to see it in Jesus' face. "This is as far as we can go buddy. Just 10." And Abraham stopped. I want to know Jesus that way. I want to recognize his walk and his face:)

Our Story-Befriended

2008-07-29T00:00:00.004-05:00

Okay, no more comments about how me and my mom dressed to go fishing! I was told to wear dark colors because of the mosquitoes. That's all I had that was dark! Now, as for my mother, that lady wears high heels with her pajamas, so I can't do a thing about it...Now on to us...

Been thinking about your story? Me too. And I've also been thinking about this next line in Matt Redman's song. Befriended, befriended by the King above all Kings. What would it mean to be befriended? I can't think of the word friend and not think of Abraham. On multiple occasions Abraham was called a "friend of God." Can you imagine? Can you imagine the chronicles of time being written and generations three, four, five times removed reading about your life, and next to your name sat the words "friend of God?" But it has to be possible doesn't it? If it was possible for Abraham doesn't it have to be possible for you and I?

And what does being a friend with God look like? What does it look like in the aspect of "our stories"? There's a story about Abraham right in Genesis 18, before God destroys Sodom and Gomorrah. You remember the one where Lot's wife turns into a pillar of salt. Well, there is a powerful interchange between friends before that ever happens. Abraham's sitting out underneath an oak tree by the tie back flap of his tent. And it's hot! And I mean hotter than a southern, hazy, humidity infested August afternoon hot. And out there he sits when he sees some men in the distance. And he runs. Why? Because he knows who it is. The very next verse says so, when he addresses one of the men as "My Lord." And then he adds, "Do not pass me by."

I know now a days when our phones rings pictures pop up or names pop up to tell us who is calling. But before all these highfalutin' things we still knew the voice of a friend when it was on the other end. Shoot, a real friend we can recognize even a hundred yards away. We can tell by their very walk, their very mannerisms who it is. It's the familiarity of friendship.

And Abraham knew. The relationship he had spent decades cultivating with the Lord, well, he knew. And Abraham didn't want God passing by without spending time with him. And at the end of that chapter the Lord takes Abraham to an even deeper place of friendship. The kind of friendship that doesn't want to keep anything from one another. Because the Lord and the other two men turn to face Sodom. And what does Abraham do? He turns too. Wherever the Lord is going he wants to be. I wonder if God chuckled? I wonder if He thought, that's my Abe, no matter what, I know he wants to hang out with me.

In the next passage the Lord looks at his other two friends and says, "Shall I hide from Abraham [My friend, and servant] what I am going to do...For I have known (chosen, acknowledged) him [as My own] so that he may teach and command his children and the sons of his house after him to keep the way of the Lord and to do what is just and righteous..." Can't you see Abraham? I imagine him like my dog Maggie when I pick up her tennis ball. She's bouncing all over, just waiting, wanting it so bad. I can see Abraham just kind of bouncing there in the sand. The dust kicking up around his sandals. God is about to tell him a secret. And not only that, God knows him. Really knows him. Knows how desperately he's longed for a child. Knows how he's loved Him with all of his heart even on the days he felt his heart would break. God knows him.

We're told that the two other men leave and head toward Sodom and that Abraham comes close to the Lord. His relationship with God let's him know that God enjoys his company. Coming close is okay. And that's when the dialogue begins. I love the dialogue part of a good story. And it doesn't get any better than this.
"Will you destroy the righteous with the wicked?" Abraham asks "What if there are 50 righteous? ...Shall not the Judge of all the earth execute judgement and do righteously?"
"If I find 50 I'll spare the whole place." God answers.
Abraham steps a little farther. "I know I'm just dust and ashes and all Lord, but what if there are just 45?"
"If I find forty-five, I will not destroy it."
Abraham steps even farther. "What about 40?"
"I will not do it for the sake of 40."
Abraham's biting his nails about now. "Oh, please don't be angry with me. But Suppose only 30 can be found there."
"I won't do it for thirty." I can imagine a slight smile across the Lord's face.
Abraham presses in even farther. "Suppose only 20 can be found there."
"I will not destroy it for 20."
He steps right up next to the Lord, lifting his eyes up to the God of the universe. "Oh, Lord, please don't be angry with me, and I will speak again only this once. Suppose ten [righteous people] shall be found there."
And the Lord said, "I will not destroy it for 10."
And then the Lord left.

Ever had questions for God? Ever had moments where you just wondered what if? I've learned God can handle our questions. But what often prevents us from asking any questions at all goes to the heart of friendship. We're not afraid to ask questions of our friends. We'll ask them to watch the dogs while we're away, babysit the kids when we need a night out with our spouse, pick up the mail while we're out of town. But conversation with God? What is that? It's based in friendship.

Abraham built a relationship with God because he wouldn't let God get away. Anytime. He wouldn't let God just walk by his house. He stopped Him. He wouldn't let God and the other three men get up and walk away from the dinner table and head toward Sodom. He followed them. But we too often let God get away. There is a passage of scripture that is very true, "Seek me while I may be found." So often we feel that tugging. That tug on our heart that whispers, "Come away with me. Talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking." And we think we can send ourselves a text message, or stick a post-it note on the mirror to remind us to take up with God on this matter at a more convenient time. But God isn't our e-mail buddy. We don't form true relationships on Facebook, or through e-mails, or text messages. Relationships, friendships, are formed when we spend three hour dinners, like the one I spent with my best friend Deneen on my birthday, catching up on everything from our favorite lipgloss to the things God's been speaking to our hearts. Friendships are formed when we know the details of a persons "story", so much so that when we see them down the street we know them by their walk.

God wants a relationship with us. He wants us to know Him that intimately. But do we? Can we discern the difference between his speaking to our hearts and our own desires? Can we see Him coming in our direction and recognize Him simply by the way He walks? Do we know that He has secret things He desires to reveal to us, secret places in Him He longs to take us to and amazing things He desires to do for us. Do we know? If we've become His friend we do.

For many years whenever difficult things have come my way or wonderful things have happened to me, I've had a friend I would always tell immediately. This past year I found that relationship stripped away. So, when difficult moments have come or exciting things have happened, my first reaction has been to pick up the phone and call my mom or someone. But I've done things differently this year. Why? Because this year I made the decision that I wanted God to call me friend. I want to know His walk. I want to know His heartbeat for me and those that I love. I want to know the story He's called me to write.

So, just the other night I got the tap on the shoulder. You know the tap. You're standing on the edge of the cliff and it's that final nudge that sends you tumbling over the edge. It wasn't any big thing. My real-estate agent had simply called to ask me if he could do an open house on Sunday. But it just happened to be my edge of the cliff tap. And over the cliff tumbling I went. By the time I came up for air my mascara was down my face, my eyes were bloodshot and I was expected for dinner with friends. I grabbed the necessary make-up articles to help me resemble normal again and got in the car. But I didn't grab the phone. Instead I began pouring my heart out to my friend. I asked Him to help me understand where this feeling "overwhelming" feeling was coming from. Was too much on my plate? Had I committed to something I shouldn't have? Was I putting my efforts into something that wasn't His plan for my life?

I didn't get an immediate answer. But what I did get was Abraham persistent. I kept following Him. As I drove back home that night I asked him again. Before I turned out the lights I asked Him again. When I woke up I was asking Him again. And as I was reading and studying that next morning, I was reading from a book I would highly recommend to anyone longing to hear the voice of God better, Walking with God, by John Eldridge, and God showed me what was happening. That sometimes emotions come in advance of where we're headed. And that "overwhelming" feeling was the enemy trying to convince me that there was too much on my plate. That something had to come off. And had I given into that emotion, I would have let go of something that the Lord had specifically called me to do. And each thing I had committed to He had confirmed to me multiple times.

Friendship got me my answer. Calling on the one, who has now truly become more than just my Father, my Lord, but now, my best friend, before I picked up the phone and called someone else got me my answer. And being persistent didn't hurt either.

One of the most important parts to our story is the privilege of friendship. You and I have been given the privilege of being friends with the Creator of the Universe. And yet we settle for so much less. As you and I write this next chapter of our lives may we listen to the tugs on our heart, may we be persistent if necessary and may we get so familiar with our God that we know Him by His walk. If we do, then others might recognize us by ours...

May this week find us writing some good dialogue...Until next week...Denise

Our Story

2008-07-28T00:00:00.004-05:00

My mother and I are officially the same age...I know. You didn't think it was possible. But a few years back she found an age she liked and decided she'd have birthdays, but no more aging. She was going to be this year forever. You've noticed by now I'm not telling what in the world that age is! But on July 16th, I officially reached it and now I have no choice but to stop aging myself, or become older than my mother. And that might not be too far of a stretch. Because as recently as a couple weeks ago, while we were walking up the street in Columbia, South Carolina, a young man gave us a big old white smile and asked if we were sisters.

(Me & Mom fishing-obviously she's having better luck than me...)

She was like a giddy school girl, I gave him a raised right eyebrow. But I can say this, if I look as good as her when I do reach the age she refuses to say she is, I'll be one lucky girl.

But birthdays have a way of causing us to reflect. And this year has brought great reflecting for me. At my church my pastor has been doing a series called "The Story." One of my favorite writers John Eldridge writes a great deal about "Our Story". And yesterday in church we were singing a song by Matt Redman, that is pretty new to me, but probably familiar to a lot of you that says,
This will be my story.
This will be my song.
You will always be my Savior.
Jesus, You will always have my heart.

As a writer of both stories and songs I'm intrigued by this concept of our lives being a "story". I don't know that I've ever thought of it this way before. So, if my life is a story, this year has been a chapter. A chapter of my life that has had more pain, more adventure, more laughter, and more of the hand of God written on its pages than any other I think I've known. Maybe if I had been as aware of Him as I have been this year, I might could say that there have been other years just as impactful. But looking back over this one, I have to say, man, what a story.

For the next little while, I wondered if you'd walk with me through "our stories." I'm going to blog using the words of Matt Redman's song as my catalyst. But for today, as a precursor to tomorrow's blog, could we just stop for a moment and realize that each of us has a story to tell. The way you and I choose to live our lives will determine how the chapter's are written. They will decide whether our stories end in triumph or tragedy, struggle or surrender.

Sometimes I think we forget we have a story. We have a story. A story that God has written uniquely for us. Now, in this society of increasing individualism, don't get lost in the fact that we have still been called to walk life out in relationship with other people. However, we cannot forget that God has things that He wants to write on our heart. Because until we give Him the ability to write on the inside of us, there is nothing available from our pen to write on the lives of others.

God has written a beautiful story on my heart this past year. And I believe this year has prepared me for this new chapter, just as the previous chapters of my life prepared me for last years chapter. May you stop today and look at back at your past year. Take a moment to recall the things God has written on your heart. I can say to you today, that my story is this...He will always be my Saviour...no matter the valleys we have to plow through the mud to get across, or the mountains we have to dig our heels into to get to the peak. And He will always have my heart...Because let's just say, he's proven mighty faithful with it. What would your last chapter say about your story? What would you want next years chapter to tell?

Here's to old stories to remember, and new stories to write...See you tomorrow...
Denise

The Divine Pause-Part Four

2008-07-22T06:00:00.000-05:00

I can't start this week without saying what another great loss we have suffered this week with the death of Tony Snow. I've always wondered through the years why so many kind, integral people seem to die so early, or are taken in such tragic ways. I think of the space shuttle challenger, Lisa Beamer's husband and so many during September 11th, Payne Stewart, and yet it seems each time, with each tragedy, the message that comes out is what a wonderful person they were, and what a deep faith they possessed. Tony Snow was one of those men. He walked his cancer out with grace and a true sense of purpose. May each of us be able to do the same. We say goodbye to a man of great character and pray that we can learn from his life.

In our final moments with Joseph we left him in his seemingly "forgotten" place. Yet no one is ever truly forgotten. God's eyes are always upon us. But yet for two years, the butler didn't remember Joseph. Not until Pharoah had a dream. It was then that Joseph was remembered. And Joseph is released to interpret Pharoah's dream. Isn't it interesting how Joseph's life revolves around dreams. It was a dream that got him in this predicament in the first place. It was a dream that had him hoping to be released. And it is a dream that finally frees him. My, how powerful are our dreams.

So in he goes to Pharaoh to interpret his dream. I can't help but wonder if this isn't often the final and hardest test. Interpreting Pharoah's dream, all the while still having one he has yet to see fulfilled. Ever had to rejoice in someones victory when you're still waiting for your own? Ever watched someone else get a miracle in their marriage, while you're desperately holding on to the belief of your own. Ever watched someone get an advancement when you were the one that should have been advanced years ago.

What would have happened if Joseph would have walked into Pharoah's throne room and said, "You've got to be kidding me. I'm not interpreting squat! I've been waiting on my own dreams to be fulfilled. I've been meeting other people's needs for years when it's suppose to be other people serving me and I ain't interpreting anything else for anybody! (Let's pretend he's from southern Egypt.) The last time I did that I sat in a cell for two more years! Interpret your own dream Mr. Fancy Pants!"

Well, because we started with the end of the story we know what would have happened. If Joseph had not humbly gone before Pharaoh, interpreted that dream with no knowledge of whether it would have had any consequence to him or not, but simply because he was asked to, then he would have had his butt sent right back to the jail cell, his family would have all died, and he would have probably had his head on a platter by evening.

How many dreams have been thwarted in that final place of obedience? How many dreams have died because we simply weren't willing to obey heaven's final request. Instead we thought it was our time and we didn't want any part in being a part of someone else's dream? Because it was about our dream. I can only imagine what the refuse piles look like. Trust me, I know my own.

But Joseph doesn't do this. And in this act of obedience it ends up becoming the catalyst to the fulfillment of the dream God had given him. The pause button on Joseph's life was released. And in releasing that button, not only was Egypt delivered from a famine, but Joseph's father and his brothers, the very ones whose act seemingly got him here are delivered as well.

God knows what needs to be accomplished in us for the releasing of our pause button. How do I know? Because remember where we started? This was God's plan. God had brought Joseph to this place, not his brother's. Their act may have accomplished it but God was the designer. Why? Because God knows what produces greatness. He knows what is ultimately needed in us to bring greatness from us. And I believe that very often the greatness of the dream will coincide with the length of the pause. If Joseph had been called to be Pharoah himself, I have a good idea the pause button might have stayed pressed a little longer. I heard T.D. Jakes say once, "For people with exceptional callings, everything in their lives will be exceptional. Including their storms as well as their victories." May I add, "and their divine pauses."

May I share one final thing? Years later when Joseph's sons were born he named one of them Ephraim. Names were very important back then. Each one had a clear meaning. And Ephraim meant, "God has made me fruitful in the land of my affliction." Joseph got it. He got the fact that in his "divine pause" heaven was growing something in him. That this pause had been about something more than just a dream. It had been about the making of a man. A man who was fruitful. A man who could look in the face of his affliction and see something of value, something worth learning, something worth becoming and then become it. Every lesson in the pause Joseph got. Every place he was called to walk he walked, with obedience and grace. And in the end God knew Joseph could be trusted with the dream.

I know pauses aren't fun. Downright frustrating at times. But I've also learned that they are one of God's best opportunities to grow greatness inside of us. Here's to the divine pauses of our lives. May we live them well. And when the pause is released, may we be ready.

These final words are taken from an interview with Tony Snow back in July of 07 when he was still Press Secretary at the White House. I felt they summed up our journey perfectly.

Tony Snow-"We want lives of simple, predictable ease—smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see—but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension—and yet don't. By his love and grace, we persevere. The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise."

The Divine Pause-Part Three

2008-07-15T00:00:00.001-05:00

Thank you to all of you who left comments on last weeks blog both publicly and privately. Integrity is one of those areas that can speak to each of us in some way. Thank you for being so willing to share how it touched you.
This week we find Joseph in prison. As if the poor fella hadn't had it bad enough, now "Miss Polly Potiphar's", as I heard Pastor Jentzen Franklin call her one time, accusation has landed Joseph in prison. Apparently, Potiphar had chosen to believe his wife above Joseph. After all, Joseph was still a servant and she was probably still his bed partner. Not a hard choice. And now Joseph finds himself in possibly one of the worst places a life could be. Not just in prison. But in prison and innocent. Is there much worse?
But once again, whether servant or prisoner, Joseph is faithful where he is planted. And once again his faithfulness takes him to the top of the food chain even in the prison. We're told that "the warden of the prison committed to Joseph's care all the prisoners who were in the prison, and whatsoever was done there, he was in charge of it. The prison warden paid no attention to anything that was in Joseph's charge, for the Lord was with him and made whatever he did to prosper."
So here Joseph is directing the prison yard games, settling the disputes over who gets the best cell. And then two powerful prisoners come in. The head honcho, Pharoah's, butler and baker. Not sure what they did to mess their lives up so bad, some burnt toast, some wrinkled sheets. But whatever they did there they were. Prison. And who is in charge of them? Joseph. Remember, not a person came in there that Joseph wasn't in charge of.
One particular night the butler and baker both had dreams. When Joseph came to check on them that next morning he could tell they were both in distress. He asked both of them what was wrong. And they both told him they had dreams. He asked them, "Do not interpretations belong to God? Tell me your dreams." And they did. And Joseph interpreted them both. The butler got the better end of the stick. His dream confirmed he would be restored to his position in three days. The baker. Well, not so lucky. In three days, well let's just say, he would have made his last bundt cake. (Sorry-Can't say bundt cake without thinking of "My Big Fat Greek Wedding.")
When Joseph had interpreted the butler's dream he asked him, or begged him, "think of me when it shall be well with you, and show kindness...mention me to Pharoah and get me out of this house, for truly I was carried away from the land of the Hebrews by unlawful force; and here too I have done nothing for which they should put me into the dungeon."
The butler gets his job back. Joseph however he forgets. For two more years, Joseph is forgotten...

Man, what truths to ponder here...

The first one that comes at us is the fact that he's there at all. The fact that a lie, finds Joseph in a prison. Ever had a lie stick you in prison? Ever had a lie told to you, told about you, that has brought you to a prison? I see people in prison from lies all the time. Most of their jail cells however are still lived walking around freely, yet there souls sit imprisoned to a lie. The lie that they'd never amount to anything. The lie that they could never be restored. The lie that they could never forgive. The lie that they could never be forgiven. The lie that shame would always be their cloak. The lie that their dream was too big, their talents too limited, their abilities too small.
And with that lie, whether spoken over you when you were a child, believed when you were a teenager, or bought into when you were an adult, it has left your very soul imprisoned. It has claimed you.
What makes Joseph different? What is worked out of him during this pause? Joseph's body is imprisoned but his soul is free. Still free to serve. Still free to notice other's pain even during his own. Still free to speak life. Still free to help others people reach their dreams. Still free. Completely confined and totally free! How beautiful is that picture? It could be ours. See, Joseph had a choice on the very day he arrived. Curse his circumstances or trust his God. He chose the latter. And it made all the difference. The choices we make remember, will determine our destiny.
And because Joseph continued to believe, God blessed him. He showed him mercy and loving kindness and gave him favor.

What else do we see in Joseph? I mentioned it a few moments ago. I'm still amazed at the fact that he noticed the sad state of the butler and the baker. How do you notice the pain of other's when your crushed beneath the weight of your own? How do you even care that someone else is suffering, when you are suffering so much? But Joseph did. He saw it. And then he ministered to it.
Can we? In the middle of our prison moments are we willing to serve another in their's? Are we willing to get our eyes off of ourselves long enough to minister to the needs of someone else's pain? It is amazing how quickly the environment of our circumstances can change when we aren't wallowing in them. It is amazing how beautifully God can move when our eyes are looking upward instead of inward and we can actually watch Him in the process.

And finally, Joseph asks to be remembered. This scene grips me in my deepest place. I can hear the anguish that is still in his voice. He even shares his innocence. And he begs to be remembered. But he isn't. He is instead forgotten. And not just for a couple days, a couple weeks or a couple months. No, Joseph is forgotten for two years.
Ever felt forgotten? Ever thought finally your chance had come and yet nothing happens? No phone call. No text message. No e-mail. Nothing. Forgotten. What do we do in the forgotten place? Even after we've asked to be remembered? What do we do with that?
I would have expected some bar shaking, some foot stomping, some dish throwing. But we get nothing. Between Genesis 40 and 41 we get not one word from Joseph. So, what can we conclude? We can conclude that Joseph had developed one very valuable thing during this season of his pause. He had become a man of exceptional faith.
Faith is refined during pause seasons. Faith is put into action by noticing the details. I believe faith was able to be activated at that seemingly "forgotten" place in Joseph's life, because he was able to see God in every place of His life where God had already moved. He saw Him in the fact that his brother's sold him and didn't kill him. He saw God in the fact that of all the men that could have purchased him, Potiphar was the one who had. He saw Him in the fact that he had found such amazing favor with Potiphar and how God had blessed the man's entire house. And he had even seen God's favor in the prison cell. And because of all the things Joseph had noticed he had the faith to know God was still in this prison cell with him.
The reason most of us have trouble cultivating real faith in God is because our attention is so self-focused that we are paying no attention to what God is doing in our lives. We're focused on the "main" thing and God is focusing on all the things that lead up to the "main" thing. Or our eyes are so focused on our problem we're not even looking for the places where God is moving. We're too focused on where we think He should be moving.

Remember when we started this series together I told you that I thought the pause might be about to be released on my life. Well, not today. In fact, even though this won't post until Tuesday I'm writing it on Sunday. I just received an e-mail stating that I was still on pause. My first reaction, pain in the gut, burning in my chest, sweating of the eyes. My second reaction, I got up and went to my usual God and me meeting place. We meet in a little path I've carved out that runs through my dining room, down the hall and through the foyer. I walk and He and I talk.
I told Him I was frustrated.
He listened quietly.
I told Him all the reasons why the things that had been suggested might not work, how even if I did all of them, if I jumped through all the hoops it still might not be the right hoop.
He was still listening.
And that's when I began to remember. "You know, what you did for me Thursday night is still amazing. Once again you've proven to take care of every detail of my life. I'm sure you will take care of this one." See, Thursday night at an early birthday celebration, I received a gift that let me know once more how every detail of my life matters to Him. And I know He will lead this part of my life as well. John's letter to the church of Philadelphia in Revelations tells me that God is "He who has the key of David, Who openns and no one shall shut, Who shuts and no one shall open." All the doors of my life are in his control.
"Be still and know." He whispered. He's been whispering this to me a lot.
"I know...I know...Thank you that I can come to you with everything that touches my life." I told Him. "You are the first place I want to be."
He knows that. This pause season has created that. If it's done nothing else, it has brought me to the knowledge that there is no one I'd rather talk to first than Him. Why? Because I've seen Him in the details and my, my has He been so kind. But I chose to see Him. I chose to see what He was doing. No matter where I found myself, jail cell, ministering to another's need, serving, forgotten, I knew I was never completely forgotten. That "nothing could ever separate me from the love that is in Christ Jesus." He has cultivated my faith in hard ways through these last fifteen years of my life. But it is that faith that today assures me I am not forgotten.

Do you know what I honestly believe? I think Joseph probably had a little talk with God after the next sun rose and there was no key jingling inside the door of his cell. I have a feeling it was probably a pretty candid conversation. And I believe that the Lord whispered to his heart, "Be Still and Know, Joseph. Just be still and know." I also believe that Joseph's faith muscles were so great at that point that he could have ripped those bars open as if he were the Hulk. But do you know what, he showed the greater faith. The greater faith that says, "I'd rather be in a jail cell with you, then a free man without you." Sometimes the best place for any of us is the jail cell, is the "divine pause." Because that is where God is.
Denise, I don't have that kind of faith. Oh, yes you do. We have each been given a "measure of faith." I honestly believe that measure is the same. Unless we're talking about the "gift of faith". What grows faith however is living a life that chooses to see God. That removes our eyes from ourselves and focus' our eyes on what God is doing in our lives. Trust me, God has been moving in your life. Look for Him. And when you begin to see Him, then trust that if the pause is where He has us for this season, then the pause is the best place in the world we can be...

A Divine Pause-Part Two

2008-07-08T07:21:00.001-05:00

Hope you've had a great week and wonderful fourth of July! I got to spend it with three of my nieces and my brother and sister-in-law eating Mexican food, ice cream and watching fireworks. We couldn't have had a better event. I also wanted to thank each of you who left a comment about last weeks post. That lesson taught me a lot and really made me conscious of the places I've been called to serve and the new opportunities that I'm given each day to serve. I'm looking forward to what I get to take away from today too.

When we left Joseph he was serving Potiphar. He had been so faithful in that place of serving that he was promoted to the head of all Potiphar had. And everything Potiphar had was blessed because of Joseph. I mean everything, his house, and everything that was in his field. We're then told that he was an attractive person and fine looking. My generation would just say Joseph was "fine."

And that's where the next challenge for Joseph arrives. It comes packaged in a dress, high heels and oh, did I forget to mention, she's the bosses wife. Not a real good scenario. We're told that she doesn't just approach him a couple times tossing her womanly wiles at him. No, we're told that she comes to him day after day asking him to go to bed with her. The first time he comes he refuses her but also tells her "See here, with me in the house my master has concern about nothing, he has put all that he has in my care. He is not greater in this house than I am; nor has he kept anything from me except you, for you are his wife. How then can I do this great evil and sin against God?"

But that refusal wasn't enough for the shameless and persistent hussy. She daily was a perpetual attack on his purity. And then she finally saw an even greater opportunity. The house was completely empty. I'm sure with the amount of servants they had that was a rare moment. So, she seized it. When she thought no one was looking and Joseph came into the house to serve her husband the way he always had, she grabbed his coat. And asked him again, adamantly, "Sleep with me." This time he didn't even offer her words, he ran leaving his coat and everything. He didn't pat her hand and say, "Be a nice girl and go back to your husband." He didn't take her in his arms and say, "We really shouldn't be doing this." No, smart boy high-tailed it and took off!

My, my...what lessons to learn...what an example he has given us to follow.

God's "holy pause" will test our integrity. Sometimes in the area of purity, sometimes in the area of finances, sometimes in the area of honesty. But it will be tested. Why? Because how many casualties have we seen of Christian leaders who get to the top of their callings and their integrity destroys them when they get there. Heaven doesn't want casualties on the battlefield of integrity. So, he pauses us. He pauses us in the place between dream and fulfillment and tests our integrity.

Now God doesn't tempt us. We're told in the Bible that "He Himself tempts no one." But, write before that passage of scripture we're told, "Blessed, happy, to be envied is the man who is patient under trial and stands up under temptation, for when he has stood the test and been approved he will receive [the victor's] crown of life which God has promised to those who love Him." We're also told "be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience." He wasn't the spirit behind the bosses wife seduction. But He does allow the trying and testing of our faith. King David said in the psalms, "For You, O God, have proved us; You have tried us as silver is tried, refined and purified."

Some of us today might be standing in the place of real temptation. Maybe it's a physical temptation. Maybe a tempting of our purity. Maybe the man in the cubicle next door, or the woman in the house down the street pays far more attention to your needs then the spouse at home. Maybe what you do in secret when no one is looking you think doesn't matter, because we'll no one is looking.

Maybe your tempted in an area of integrity, integrity with your money, integrity at your job, integrity with your honesty. And each time we give into that temptation, thinking it's no big deal, the government doesn't know, our spouse won't ever find out, our employer won't ever know what we're doing, we're missing what Joseph got. Joseph didn't look at Ms. Floozy Potiphar and say "I can't do this to your husband." He saw something much bigger. He said, "I can't sin this way against God." Granted our failings in our area of purity leave a wake and hurt people who love and trusted us and have consequences of their own. Sometimes heartbreaking, life altering, family destroying, job losing, jail making, friend losing consequences. But deeper consequence than all of that is the chasm it places between us and heaven. Because the last place we want to be when impurity has been allowed to live actively in our lives and hearts is in the presence of a Holy God. And that is what the tempter of our soul is truly after. The devil of this world, and yes there is a real one, could care less if our family is torn apart. He could care less if our children have to be shuffled between one home and another. He could care less if you lose your job, land in jail or lose every friend you have in this world, what he is ultimately after is the chasm between our heart and God's.

The testing of our purity, of our integrity, is a place where God is desiring to create the character in us needed to fulfill the calling in us. If you've failed in that area, stop. Run. Flee. If you have to move to another department at work, quit your job, move to a new neighborhood, if you have to come clean in order to be free, do what you need to do. But stop. Did you know that there is not one temptation that you and I face that "is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience. But God is faithful and He will not let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but He will always provide a way out-that means of escape to a landing place-that you may be capable and strong and powerful patiently to bear up under it."

I wish I could tell us one day there will be no more temptation. Resist it enough and we'll never be tempted with anything again. But this side of heaven that just isn't true. Because the enemy of our soul won't quit tempting us even when we get to the place where the dream we've been given is fulfilled. But if we fail when we get to that place the casualty count is much greater. That is why God allows the temptation during the pause. Because when we get to the place where the dream we've been given is fulfilled, God wants our integrity to be able to keep us there.

A Divine Pause

2008-07-01T08:00:00.003-05:00

I'm still amazed at all the beautiful comments you are posting. Especially on the one we did for Father's Day. It is so evident the impacts our fathers have had on our lives. It was also interesting to see how many of you were touched by the passing of Tim Russert. Probably made all of us grab on to those we love and hold them a little longer, hug them a little tighter, and make us grateful for each day.

I almost posted this post this past week, but felt like I needed to "pause". I thought it was too long. More like a message I would teach instead of a blog. In fact, through some interesting and divinely appointed circumstances I did end up teaching it this past Sunday, but as I reflected on it, I still thought it was something to share here. However, since it's so long, I'm thinking we'll make it the blog for the month of June. Kind of like walking a journey together this month.

The thought came the week before last when I was talking with my dad. I had just gotten off the phone with a conversation that could possibly open up a door I've waited for years to open. As we were talking I began recounting quite a few things through my life I've been required to wait on. I said, "It's like I've spent years with the pause button pressed on my life." I wish I could tell you that those years of waiting have been peaceful little siestas by the seashore. But if I'm being honest they felt more like maniacal monsoons. Some of these years of pause have been filled with frustration, tears, questions and quiet a few doubts. But they've also been filled with a lot of opportunity for growth.

Pauses do that you know. If we allow them too. We talked about this a little bit when we talked about waiting a couple posts back. But can I take it just a step farther. When I think of a "divine pause" I can't help but think of the life of Joseph in the Bible. Don't know if you know him or not. He was a daddy's boy. His brother's couldn't stand him because his dad didn't have enough wisdom to not show his favoritism. His father even had a multi-color coat made for him. Can't say that didn't attract a little bit of attention in a time period where I'm sure neutrals were much more of the fashion statement. If any of you have ever seen Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat that starred my childhood sweetheart Donny Osmond, even though he didn't know he was my sweetheart, then you know what kind of coat I'm talking about.

As if the coat wasn't bad enough to make his brothers despise him, Joseph then has a dream. A dream that has his brother's bowing down to him. Want to know how well that went over? They sold his behind. Yep. But he was lucky. Their first plan was to kill him. Fortunately for him they were more greedy than they were angry.

Now, knowing those two things can we look at the end of the story first. And trust me, as a writer, I never read the ending first. I honestly didn't even know people did that. Until one day a friend of mine told me how she always flipped to the back of the book and read the last page. I was mortified! I said, "You what! Please don't do that when you're reading Flies on the Butter." She promised me she wouldn't, but I'll have to take her word for it.

So, breaking my own rule, can we look at the end of Joseph's story first? At the end we find Joseph, standing as the right hand man to the biggest guy in Egypt. You could say he is now like the Vice President. And what's happening? He's living out his dream. His brothers are bowing down to him. Except they don't have a clue this here boy is their brother. But when they do....Oh, my word...when they do can you imagine the fear? These boys were shaking in their sandals. And Joseph says something very powerful to them. He says, "Don't be afraid. Don't be disheartened or lose your hope. Don't be angry either, because you sold me here. Because what has actually happened is God sent me ahead of you to save your very lives."

What?! Where is Joseph's rage? Where is Joseph's getting even? Where is his moment of just dessert?

I think I know. It's in the last line. He knew this was a God pause. He knew something they didn't and had been through things they'd never understand. And because he had lived all of these years in a "divine pause" all of the things that would have created that kind of reaction no longer dwelt inside of him.

What had really happened? Joseph had come to realize that sometimes in life heaven presses the pause button. Why? Because the pause button is God's way of saying, "Okay now, I've got to make you the man or woman you need to be in order to handle where I'm taking you."

Ever had a dream? Ever had something you felt you were called to do, and no matter how desperately you try to reach for it, life just seemed to move on with no sign of what you thought you were called to do coming to fruition? Maybe you wanted to be a husband or a wife, and yet you find yourself in the land of perpetual singleness. Maybe you've had the dream of becoming a parent and yet the little magic stick with its single pink dash screams "Not now!" Maybe you have a dream for a marriage that is more magic than mess. Maybe you have a song in your heart, or a book in your head, or a mission in your soul. And you know it's something divine that heaven placed inside of you, yet instead of doors swinging open, it seems instead that storm after storm keeps blowing through, feeling as if you're getting father away from the dream instead of closer to it.

I know. Trust me, I know. Joseph knows too. A lot happened from the moment that his brothers sold him to the moment they bowed down to him. He is sold by his brothers to a band of Ishmaelites who in turn sale him to a man named Potiphar. Potiphar is an officer of Pharoah. And it is there that Joseph becomes a servant. I mean, here is a boy who was the cream of his daddy's crop. Here is a fella with a dream that his brothers are going to be bowing down to him and instead he's the one doing the bowing. He's taking care of someone else's life. Getting their coffee. Scheduling their appointments.

The boy who trotted around in his multi-colored coat and arrogantly told his brothers of his dream is now being dealt with in a "divine pause". And heaven is telling him in order to be great, you must learn to serve. Because serving is a prerequisite of greatness. "The one who is the chief and leader is the one who serves." Jesus himself said "I came not to be served but to serve." Serving rids us of our pride. And "pride cometh before a fall."

Heaven ordains "divine pauses" in our life to rid us of our arrogance. To remind us of our real calling. Greatness is found in serving. Because heaven knows that pride destroys many a great leader. And in return kills many a dream.

Pride's a hard one. It's behind most of the emotions we feel. Anger-"Who do they think they are treating me this way?" Bitterness-"I deserve to hold this grudge." Self-pity- "Doesn't anyone know what is happening to me?" It rears its ugly head at drive-thru windows and checkout lines. It roars to life behind the wheel of the car and often in our deepest moment of crisis and betrayal. And so the pause presses us. Sometimes heaven even pushes on the very button of our pride in order to make us aware of all the places it hides and resides. Because heaven knows better than anyone else how destructive pride is. Think about it, had there been no pride then you and I would not live today in a world filled with both good and evil. It was pride that created its very existence.

I've discovered in the season of my pause that there is a great relief in knowing that sometimes God loves us enough to pause us. And when I know that heaven is the source of my pause, it makes its stay a privilege. I'm not saying pauses aren't difficult. What I'm saying is that when you know there is a divine purpose behind it, we can appreciate, even embrace the changes it will grow in us.

In this our first post on the "divine pause", may we reflect at length on the area of our pride and the depths of our service. There are different kinds of serving. Sometimes we serve in the areas of our calling, in our home as a spouse or parent, in our jobs and ministries. But there are also other kinds of servings, the mission trips, the orphanage visits, the medical relief. And sometimes we serve in other ways. We buy groceries for a friend. We take a meal to someone with a new baby, or to a friend who is too sick to make dinner for themselves. We bring a couple neighborhood girls into our home and teach them about being young ladies and making right choices. We mow someone's lawn when we notice they're not able to get it done.

Serving has many different faces. The one face it doesn't own is pride. Unless of course, we're serving to be seen. But true service spits in the face of pride. If this is a pause season of your life, like it is mine, may we learn to be true servants. Seeing the need and then meeting it. May we realize that there are some pauses in life that God himself ordains. And when he pauses us it is for reasons bigger than ourselves. Greatness begins with serving. Who knows, maybe when we learn this one well, heaven will release its pause.

A Weekend With A Six-Year-Old

2008-06-24T10:39:00.008-05:00

(Abigail's view from her buggy-that she conned me into pushing her around in-doing her Elvis impersonation.)

I spent the weekend with a six year old. I’m home with my parents for a week and my older brother lives about an hour away so his baby girl came to spend the weekend with us. It was her turn in the grandchild rotation… My, my, six year olds have a lot of words to use up in a day. What’s that aunt Niecy? Why do you do that Aunt Niecy? Want to play hangman Aunt Niecy? Let’s play the alphabet game Aunt Niecy? Is this fun Aunt Niecy? Guess which song I’m whistling Aunt Niecy!

I discovered that shopping, for a six year old, isn’t that much fun, when you're not looking for them anyway, seeing as we had just left Belk where her Nana had bought her a dress, an outfit and a bathing suit. She informed me however, that this shopping adventure was b-o-r-i-n-g. She asked me when we were actually going to have fun. However, I was having a good time, because she was making it rather entertaining for me. She declared she needed to be pushed in the buggy. So I did. And from her staring back at me position, that you can see from her picture, she proceeded to enlighten me on the fact that she was more than willing to spend the entire week with me if I needed her to. (Even though she’s going home with me Saturday for a week.) She also informed me that she had been kissed by the neighbor boy, and that once her father found out told him, unless he had a ring and the money for the rehearsal dinner he better not kiss his baby girl again. (Apparently she didn’t know the kiss was coming.) And she also gave me one more hysterical Elvis impersonation.

I found her pretty interesting to watch too. The way she’d furrow her brow when you posed a question she found rather ridiculous. The way she lost all her sense of hearing when she was watching cartoons. The way she threw her head back and laughed wildly at the antics of my Shih Tzu Sophie. And when I dropped her off at vacation bible school she left me with a shrug of the shoulders, making it clear she would have much preferred crawling back in the car with me, just to go wherever.

I found myself missing the noise when I headed back to my parent's house. The endless musings on everything from the numbers on my dashboard to the yellow tweetie bird she found stuck between my car seats was all gone. I missed her whistling to. And her laugh. Man, that laugh will get you.

Can’t help but think about my heavenly Father. Can’t help but find myself amazed that God doesn’t wear out. I mean, I know I hound him enough for ten people. But with all of the people He has asking questions, offering opinions, singing praises, shouting accusations, I can’t help but wonder how He doesn’t just shut us all out for a while. Put up a “Do not Disturb” sign, for oh, a half a century. Or hang up an “Out to lunch” sign and head off for some manna and quail for a couple decades.

But for some reason He doesn’t. And not only does He not shut us out for a season, but He does the exact opposite. He invites us to seek Him and puts up road signs clearly pointing the way. He puts the doorknocker out there and says, “Go ahead. Take a whack. I’ll answer.” He hangs up the “Open for Business- First Million questions free”, and allows us the ever-present access to what is holy.

And if He hasn’t heard from us in a while, He misses us. So much so that He comes looking for us. Maybe we’re caught somewhere wounded. He picks us up, bandages the wound and carries us back home where we belong. Maybe He finds us lost. Directionless. Frustrated. He comes looking for those too. And He first asks us if we really want to be found. (Amazingly enough some don’t.) But if we say yes, He picks us up too and heads back in the direction of safety.

I have to say, I’m grateful I can’t wear Him out. Trust me, I’ve tried. Found it impossible. I’m also glad in the moments where I got myself in a pickle, found myself in a briar patch, or simply took some wrong turns, He came looking for me. And back to it we went. Living life together, while I bombarded Him with questions He’s been all to willing to answer.

I’ll make an eight-hour trip Saturday with a six-year old and a ten-year old. My twelve-year-old niece is going to hang out at home with her mom since she just came a couple weeks ago. I’m sure I’ll spend those eight hours dissecting most of life from the perspectives of young girls, still finding baby dolls worth holding and coloring books worth coloring in. I’ll get perpetual questions of “Are we there yet?” and “Can we stop so I can pee?” “

And I’m sure there will come a moment when I’ll say, “Why don’t you put a DVD in and stick your headphones on.” And that will afford me a couple hours of peace. And while I’m enjoying their silence and I’m listening to Rascal Flatts sing a song like “Every Day”, I’ll be grateful that “every day” He’s available. “Every hour” He’s got my back. And “every moment” He’s completely aware of where I am.

The Difficult Questions-Song/I will Remember You

2008-06-17T05:55:00.005-05:00

Sunday morning I woke up and cut on the television and my man Tim wasn't there. His friends were. They were remembering him. But his chair sat empty as the backdrop. I couldn't watch the entire program because I had to head to church so I recorded the last part. As I climbed into bed Sunday evening and watched the ending I cried thinking I wouldn't get to see that big burly bear, with the smile that made you feel like you knew him, again. And I wondered who would fill his chair? Or better yet, who could fill his chair?

Driving home last night, pondering today's blog, I thought of all the things I'd heard people say about Tim over the weekend. There was the "straight shooter", "consummate family man", "Buffalo Bills fan", "Most prepared", " Amazing Researcher", "Fair", and the one that struck me most, "Not afraid to ask the difficult questions." His son said he was the "questionnaire of the American People."

I think the reason so many people liked him was because you didn't really know where his political views fell. Because no matter your political tilt he wouldn't hold back on what he would ask you and you could rest assured he had done his research. He said about himself, probably because of his legal background, that whatever position his guest had, he would take the opposite.

Another thing I noticed is that not one bad thing was said about him. In this media, right-left world, here was a man, entrenched in the middle of it all, and the smell of smoke wasn't even on his clothes. Pretty amazing. Pretty challenging.

So, with the sunroof opened last night and the windows rolled down, I began to ask myself, "Denise, are you willing to ask the tough questions of others? Better yet, are you willing to ask the tough questions of yourself?"

I'm not crazy about asking tough questions. Of myself or others. Not real interested in conflict. I'm the peacemaker type. "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!" So, I always try to find mama and make sure she's happy! But there are seasons where the difficult questions must be asked. And if they aren't, something will be lost because of it.

Do you have anyone in your life asking you the hard questions? Do you have anyone close enough, who loves you enough, to get into your stuff, or to challenge your rough places? I've found these are essential to growth. Allowing the few who know us in our deep places, get into our deep places, is necessary for true growth. I've always said, "If a man isn't willing to learn, then I don't want him on my team."

I have a couple very close friends who can get up in my grill. My first reaction often, is to bristle. I don't like it. I want to defend myself. Explain all the reasons why my way was the best way. I often retreat even. Sometimes to sulk, but always to think. And after thinking, weighing their words, I'm usually struck by their profound wisdom and insight. And I'm always reminded that it came through their love.

And can we ask the difficult question of ourselves? I've found myself doing this so much over the last year especially. The David prayer, "The search me oh God, try me and see if there be any wicked way in me." And I always throw in "And then get it out!" You know what I've found out happens when we pray this prayer. Going back to the heart of our daddy from our last post, is that God is usually very gracious in His dealings with us, when we come to Him with a heart desiring to be searched. Desiring to be known. Desiring to be changed.

He is the gentle prodder. I say God often tugs me, and it's usually in a direction opposite of the one I'm headed. He nudges me over that impatience at the drive-thru window. He tugs me over that pride that continually tries to push its way to the surface and demand its way. He presses me over my fears, reminding me that when I'm fearing, there is no way I can be trusting. And after he nudges, or tugs, or presses, He usually bandages whatever wound has been made, props me up on his knee and lets me hang out there until all the tears are gone and I realize all this is for my good.

It's time we asked the "tough questions" of ourselves and others. In this generation where anything goes, nothing is sacred and the motto of life is "Have it Your way", someone needs to. And I think we can learn something from how Tim did it. We can do it fairly, respectfully, and honestly.

One day our chair will be empty. One day people will assess how we walked through this life. Maybe not by spending a weekend on television talking about us, but I bet we'll be the topic of conversation over a lot of dinner tables. What will they say? What will the consensus be?

"She was so bitter. She never would let go of that one." "He was so angry. Don't think I ever saw him that he wasn't fussing about something." "She was so insecure. She never saw the value inside of her." "He was so jealous. Never could be happy for anyone else's successes."

Or could they say, "Oh, that girl. I'll never forget the time she challenged me to come up higher." "Yes, he was an amazing man of character. I never once saw him compromise his integrity." "She was always learning. Never settling for anything less than the best for her life and the life of those around her."

Trust me they'll talk. Don't believe me? Then, ask God if you can eavesdrop. I'm sure you'll get an ear full. The good thing is we're still here. If you're reading this, you're still here! That means we still have the opportunity to ask the difficult questions. What would the world be today, if everyone was willing to do something so brave?

My daddy...Song/Butterfly Kisses

2008-06-14T21:00:00.006-05:00

When I heard that Tim Russert had died I picked up the phone and called my dad. Hearing the news of Mr. Russert made me actually tear up. I shared every Sunday morning with him. I trusted him. And I'm not alone. Because I've talked to quite a few people who shed a few tears over his death. But I have a feeling that the trust people had for him stemmed largely from his openness about his love for his family and his endearing book "Big Russ and Me."

But hearing of him being gone made me want to talk to my dad. My dad was there with my first steps and has been there for the rest of this journey. He and I talk almost every day, but we hadn't touched base yet on Friday. So, when I got him on the other end of the phone, I told him I just called to tell him I loved him and hated that I couldn't be with him on Father's Day. But then I informed him I planned on crashing his and mom's anniversary this coming Friday. He laughed.

I said, "You don't mind if I go eat with you?"

He said, "No, we'd love the company. But I'm not going to Leo's."

For those of you who don't know, Leo's is my favorite restaurant. It's a hole in the wall, beer joint in the little town of Lugoff, SC, next to Camden, where I graduated from High School and my parents still live. And it has the best chicken wings you'll ever eat. And food has always been important to me. So important in fact, that it was part of one of the first conversations I ever actually remember having with my dad.

He was taking me to kindergarten one morning and I said, "Dad, do you think God will have fried chicken in heaven?"

He said, "Baby girl, if you love fried chicken God will have fried chicken."

And since that conversation, I have always believed that God cared about everything that mattered to me. That not one thing was too insignificant to ask Him about or concern Him with, because I grew up with a dad who never found any question of mine too inconvenient.

As I've grown, me and my brother's make fun of my dad a lot more. He makes weird sounds, will scare the living pee-turkey out of you when he drives, claps widely when he laughs and yells at himself a lot. I've always dreamed of being on the Amazing Race, even though I'm afraid of heights, have OCD when it comes to staying in hotels, travel with my own sheets and Lysol anything that's bolted down, but have still always wanted to be go on the Amazing Race. My dad would love to be on it too, but when I sent in my audition tape a couple years ago, I ended up auditioning with my baby brother, because we just couldn't handle knowing dad would be caught on television yelling at himself. He does it most often in the kitchen when he drops food, ice, anything. Don't know why he drops so much in the kitchen, but that's just where most of the hollerin' comes from.

But there are other things I've noticed as I've grown too. I notice how much I value his opinion. I love it when I've just written a new story in a fiction book, and I've laughed out loud and I call him to read it and he laughs with me. I call him whenever I'm preparing for a message that I'm going to deliver to a church, and run something by him and he help me finds some reference I need or confirms I've done okay. And when I deliver that same message, I can hear him come out of me sometimes. And every now and then I clap when I laugh, and even yell at myself every now and then. And to be honest, I hope I never lose any of it.

But the thing I appreciate the most about my dad is how he loved me. Because the way he loved me, has allowed me to know the love of my heavenly father. Might not have been that way for all of us. Some of you today might dread this day like the plague. You might have lost your dad and today's just a day to get through. Some of you might not have spoken to your dad in years and just the thought of devoting an entire day to him seems ridiculous. And for many, the way their earthly father raised them has given them a distorted view of their heavenly father.

Can I tell you today, that no matter your earthly example, the Creator of the Universe cares about every detail of your life. Don't believe me? Then why does He bother with knowing the number of hairs on your head, or why would He fashion your days? Because He cares about you so intricately. So uniquely. So completely.

Years ago I was collaborating on a book. I had a poor excuse for a printer and an even poorer excuse for a computer and it crashed about sixteen hours before the finished manuscript was suppose to be completed. Fortunately, I had just printed out a hard copy, but that still meant I had to retype the entire one hundred and sixty five page manuscript. And I had already wasted four hours trying to find someone who could salvage it from my computer. But it was gone.

When I finally finished typing it about two hours before it was due, I pressed the print button and listened as it began to hum from the printer. But I knew the printer couldn't be trusted, so I went down stairs, slipped on some pajamas and came back upstairs and laid down on the sofa in my office so it wouldn't get hung up and delay the project even more. When I laid down on the sofa I realized I had forgotten to put on any socks and my feet were freezing. (Just so you know, I wear socks to bed...) But my body was so tired I couldn't move. And it was either get up and get a pair, or ask Maggie to go get some. Now, if you know anything about Shih-tzu's they are an ornery breed. But Maggie is off the charts! This dog at six weeks old wouldn't let you hold her. She'd climb off your chest and walk to the end of the sofa, let out a huff and make sure you knew she didn't need to be bothered. She let's you know what she needs when she needs it. And all I can say is now she is thirteen and ornery doesn't even begin to describe her.

But here I was physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted, and way too tired to go get socks, when my Maggie, jumped up on the end of the sofa and stretched her furry body right across my feet. This was as big a miracle as the sea parting. I promise. And in that moment, God whispered to my heart, "This is how much I love you. Enough to warm your feet."

(Dad and four of his girls-his oldest granddaughter Hannah & his youngest, Georgia)

I can't tell you how many times I've thought of that through the years when I've doubted if God was really aware of where I was or what I needed. And those words come flooding back, "This is how much I love you. Enough to warm your feet."

So, if your dad is still around today, give him a call. Tell him you love him. If you haven't spoken in years, let it go. Maybe he fathered you from his own broken place. And what will winning a war of wills prove in the end? If your daddy is gone, take a moment and remember him with a friend. Tell them a story about what he meant to you. Or leave a post here and share it with us, we'd love to know. And if you've spent your life thinking God couldn't love you because you've let your father be the mirror, may I whisper the same words to you. He loves you enough to warm your feet. Just let Him. You'll forget you ever even needed socks...